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+----- Thread: NOLA brings back the biebs (/showthread.php?tid=10020)

NOLA brings back the biebs - bovovovo - 08-18-2018

@Beaver I am glad we were able to reconcile our differences and bring an end to this bloody war

Blackford Oakes - S
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NOLA brings back the biebs - Beaver - 08-18-2018

We observe today not a victory of team but a celebration of freedom--symbolizing an end as well as a beginning--signifying renewal as well as change. For I have sworn before you and Almighty Bovo the same solemn oath our forebears prescribed nearly ten seasons ago.

The league is very different now. For memers hold in their mortal hands the power to abolish all forms of multis and all forms of memeing. And yet the same revolutionary beliefs for which our forebears fought are still at issue around the league--the belief that the rights of players come not from the generosity of the commissioner but from the hand of Bovo.

We dare not forget today that we are the heirs of that first season. Let the word go forth from this time and place, to friend and foe alike, that the torch has been passed to a new generation of Second Line--born in this offseason, tempered by war, disciplined by a hard and bitter peace, proud of our ancient heritage--and unwilling to witness or permit the slow undoing of those memeing rights to which this nation has always been committed, and to which we are committed today at home and also on the road.

Let every team know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe to assure the survival and the success of shitposting.

This much we pledge--and more.

To those old teams whose cultural and spiritual origins we share, we pledge the loyalty of faithful friends. United, there is little we cannot do in a host of cooperative ventures. Divided, there is little we can do--for we dare not meet a powerful challenge at odds and split asunder.

To those new teams whom we welcome to the ranks of the meme, we pledge our word that one form of tyrannical control shall not have passed away merely to be replaced by a far more iron tyranny. We shall not always expect to find them supporting our view. But we shall always hope to find them strongly supporting their own freedom to meme-and to remember that, in the past, those who foolishly sought power by riding the back of the otter ended up inside.

To those peoples in the huts and villages of Colorado struggling to break the bonds of mass misery, we pledge our best efforts to help them help themselves, for whatever period is required--not because the Yeti may be doing it, not because we seek their Most Outstanding Player votes, but because it is right. If a free meme team cannot help the many who are meme poor, it cannot save the few who are meme rich.

To our sister team south of our border, we offer a special pledge--to convert our good words into good deeds--in a new pipeline for progress--to assist free players and free teams in casting off the chains of boredom. But this peaceful revolution of hope cannot become the prey of hostile powers. Let all our neighbors know that we shall join with them to oppose anti-meme aggression or subversion anywhere in the DSFL. And let every other power know that this developmental league intends to remain the master of its own house.

To that league assembly of various teams, the Head Office, our last best hope in an age where the instruments of war have far outpaced the instruments of memeing, we renew our pledge of support--to prevent it from becoming merely a forum for invective--to strengthen its shield of the new and the weak--and to enlarge the area in which its writ may run.

Finally, to those teams who would make themselves our adversary, we offer not a pledge but a request: that both sides begin anew the quest for friendship, before the dark powers of destruction unleashed by shitposting engulf all humanity in planned or accidental self-destruction.

We dare not tempt them with weakness. For only when our meme arsenals are sufficient beyond doubt can we be certain beyond doubt that they will never be employed for nefarious purposes.

But neither can two great and powerful groups of teams take comfort from our present course--both sides overburdened by the cost of modern memeing, both rightly alarmed by the steady spread of the deadly shitpost, yet both racing to alter that uncertain balance of terror that stays the hand of the NSFL’s final war.

So let us begin anew--remembering on both sides that civility is not a sign of weakness, and sincerity is always subject to proof. Let us never negotiate out of fear. But let us never fear to negotiate.

Let both sides explore what problems unite us instead of belaboring those problems which divide us.

Let both sides, for the first time, formulate serious and precise proposals for the inspection and control of arms--and bring the absolute power to destroy other nations under the absolute control of all nations.

Let both sides seek to invoke the wonders of memeing instead of its terrors. Together let us explore the emojis, conquer the shitpost, eradicate hurtful words, tap dat ass, and encourage friendship and loyalty.

Let both sides unite to heed in all corners of the league the command of Isaiah--to "undo the heavy burdens . . . (and) let the oppressed go free."

And if a beach-head of cooperation may push back the jungle of suspicion, let both sides join in creating a new endeavor, not a new balance of power, but a new league of law, where the strong are just and the weak secure and the peace preserved.

All this will not be finished in the first one hundred days. Nor will it be finished in the first one thousand days, nor in the life of this Contract, nor even perhaps in our lifetime in this league. But let us begin.

In your hands, my fellow players, more than mine, will rest the final success or failure of our course. Since this team was founded, each generation of Second Liners has been summoned to give testimony to its team loyalty. The graves of young Legion and Second Liners who answered the call to service surround the league.

Now the trumpet summons us again-not as a call to meme, though memeing we need--not as a call to flame, though flamed we are--but a call to bear the burden of a long twilight struggle, season in and season out, "rejoicing in hope, patient in tribulation"--a struggle against the common enemies of the league: humorless, rude, hurtful Otters.

Can we forge against these enemies a grand and global alliance, ASFC and NSFC, NSFL and DSFL, that can assure a more fruitful career for all players? Will you join in that historic effort?

In the long history of the league, only a few draft classes have been granted the role of defending meme freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I do not shrink from this responsibility--I welcome it. I do not believe that any of us would exchange places with any other people or any other draft class. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this endeavor will light our league and all who serve it--and the glow from that fire can truly light the world.

And so, my fellow Second Liners: ask not what your team can do for you--ask what you can do for your team.

My fellow players of the league: ask not what New Orleans will do for you, but what together we can do for the freedom of memeing.

Finally, whether you are Second Liners of New Orleans or player of the league, ask of us here the same high standards of strength and sacrifice which we ask of you. With a good conscience our only sure reward, with history the final judge of our deeds, let us go forth to lead the league we love, asking Bovo’s blessing and Bovo’s help, but knowing that here in the NSFL Bovo’s work must truly be our own.

Thank you, Bovo bless the New Orleans Second Line, and I accept this contract.

NOLA brings back the biebs - kckolbe - 08-18-2018

That is the biggest shit post I have ever seen, not counting media and HO announcements, of course.

NOLA brings back the biebs - Daybe - 08-19-2018

(08-18-2018, 02:14 PM)bovovovo Wrote:@Beaver I am glad we were able to reconcile our differences and bring an end to this bloody war

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You’re so silly


NOLA brings back the biebs - Ben - 08-22-2018

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http://probaseballexperience.jcink.net/ind...indpost&p=37384