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+---- Thread: *Statement Regarding San Antonio's Gym (/showthread.php?tid=14098)
*Statement Regarding San Antonio's Gym - TomHanks - 07-01-2019
So, there have been some rumours surrounding the current status of the San Antonio Marshal’s gym. My lawyers have advised me not to comment on the situation, but you know ol’ Dugan’s been drinking, and I don’t listen to my lawyers on principle anyways.
I’d like to start by addressing some comments I made the other night publicly, wherein I said that I wish I could draft every single season 17 prospect to Tijuana. I stand by that remark, each and every one of you is incredible. While I know we’ll bring in some seriously talented players, we couldn’t find a way to trade for 100% of the picks in this draft, so I had to get a little more creative to find a solution.
Perhaps it was the bourbon, perhaps it was the scotch, could’ve even been just my own ingenious mind, but either way; I and a team of undisclosed helpers made strides to give as many prospects as possible a Tijuana welcome. Portland and Kansas City are a bit of a trek, and like I said, we’d been drinking. So, we decided to make a little trip over to San Antonio and do a little bit of redecorating in their gym. Which is why no matter if you’re drafted to Tijuana or San Antonio, when you arrive at your gym, you’ll see a lovely red hue all over the walls. By the vending machines, you’ll also find a very sizable Tijuana Luchadores logo. If you’re in Tijuana it might look a little more official than the spray-painted version in San Antonio, but the sentiment is the same.
Was it a wise idea to cross the border while under the influence armed with only paint, brushes, lockpicks, and more alcohol, only to break into our rival’s gym and spend the night painting it red? Looking at it written out like that I think I’m going to have to go with no. Would I like to take this opportunity to apologize to San Antonio and the Marshals organisation? No, it was hilarious and I’m thrilled with how this turned out. Am I proud of my actions? Abso-freaking-lutely I am. I haven’t had that much fun since coaching women’s baseball. Why am I confessing out in the open like this and aren’t I anticipating some backlash? I’m already back in Mexico, baby. San Antonio aren’t going to go through the extradition process just because me and some buddies painted their gym red. Which is why it’s the perfect crime. Makes an impact but isn’t serious enough to take legal action.
To everyone who will be drafted by San Antonio who gets to see my handiwork, let me know what you think. I think we did I really stand up job, especially since we thought it would take a lot less time than it ended up taking. Painting is harder than we thought, and that gym is genuinely really impressive. But that awful green colour had to be dealt with, and I’m a “take matters into my own hands” sort of guy.
If you’re drafted by Kansas City or Portland, I apologize that I won’t be able to give you a Luchadores welcome, but know that I want you on my team too.
I hope this has shown all the new rookies just how much Jimmy Dugan is willing to go above and beyond for you guys, so if we don't call your name on draft night, do yourselves a favour and demand a trade to Tijuana, we could always use more talent!
*Statement Regarding San Antonio's Gym - Duilio05 - 07-01-2019
Red? My gym is Red! Dugan! If you want to see red, you've got it. I'm angry! I will be giving Tijuana a heart felt response.
*Statement Regarding San Antonio's Gym - timeconsumer - 07-01-2019
Portland is a shorter drive than San Antonio
*Statement Regarding San Antonio's Gym - TomHanks - 07-01-2019
(07-01-2019, 01:41 PM)timeconsumer Wrote:Portland is a shorter drive than San Antonio
I knew I shouldn't have asked Forrest which was closer...