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+---- Thread: *DSFL Prospects Endangered by Feral Herpes Monkeys (/showthread.php?tid=19663)
*DSFL Prospects Endangered by Feral Herpes Monkeys - ronanb23 - 03-02-2020
As you may have seen reported in the New York Post, there is a pack of feral monkeys infected with herpes roaming the Jacksonville area.
Prospect Bowl XXII has a team in the area, the Jacksonville Fury, with 22 players currently in danger of being infected, as well as the 23 players from the Tennessee Tigercats who will visit for their first game in AGFC Pool Two
Fury WR Ronan Briscoe said of the monkeys, "I've seen them outside my Motel 6 window for the past 4 days straight. They peep in and just start licking their lips. I thought I would be scouted here but not by herpes-ridden monkeys."
Fury TE Heath Evans @`Feeler` said, "I'm concerned, but at least [Fury FS Shawn] Dawkins doesn't have to be, you can't catch what you've already got"
When asked why a team was placed in an area with such dangerous conditions, NSFL Commisioner @bex said, "Take it up with the sim gods."
It is worth noting that neither the NSFL or the DSFL currently have herpes treatment covered in the last collective bargaining agreement, an issue that may need to be addressed in the next CBA if Prospect Bowl games are to continue to be held in Jacksonville.
*DSFL Prospects Endangered by Feral Herpes Monkeys - Memento Mori - 03-02-2020
Has there been a statement issued on the likelihood of this spreading to the Miami area? Myself and the rest of the Grenadiers roster are extremely concerned. The blasé attitude of the commissioner is worrying.
*DSFL Prospects Endangered by Feral Herpes Monkeys - ronanb23 - 03-02-2020
(03-02-2020, 02:11 PM)Memento Mori Wrote:Has there been a statement issued on the likelihood of this spreading to the Miami area? Myself and the rest of the Grenadiers roster are extremely concerned. The blasé attitude of the commissioner is worrying.
According to the University of Wisconsin, they only move about 1.42 km per day, and Jacksonville is 556.1 km away from Miami, so by my calculations, you've got a year before herpes judgment day bud
*DSFL Prospects Endangered by Feral Herpes Monkeys - Memento Mori - 03-02-2020
(03-02-2020, 12:18 PM)ronanb23 Wrote:According to the University of Wisconsin, they only move about 1.42 km per day, and Jacksonville is 556.1 km away from Miami, so by my calculations, you've got a year before herpes judgment day budThat's a relief. I'd not been to Florida prior to the Prospect Bowl so my knowledge of Florida geography is fairly limited.
*DSFL Prospects Endangered by Feral Herpes Monkeys - Voltaqe - 03-02-2020
This league really went down hill. My prospect bowl we were staying in real hotels not just a motel 6. Think the players association needs to step in.