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*Fantasy Football Rankings - retrospace111 - 06-09-2020
Hey new people. It's me, Zamir Kehla, the #1 Fantasy player from last season. Since I'm such a nice person who's known around the league for my acts of kindness, I'm going to showing you some insight on my list of the best fantasy players for you to draft. Let's jump right into it.
QB
1. Easton Cole
Cole is abusing the 79 speed glitch, so he's going to be a really good QB this season. He also has the best WR in the league in Net Gaines, and their RB sucks, so expect them to throw the ball a lot.
2. Cooter Bigsby
Good ol' cooter! Did you know this guy peaked at 1300 TPE??? 1300!! That's a lot. He still has great stats, and he's on a really good team. The Yellowknife Wraiths don't even run the ball much. Their #1 back, Mathias Hanyadi, retired! Now they are stuck with Acura Skyline, a 200 TPE rookie whos gone IA. Their defense is one of the worst too, so they are stuck with an air raid attack.
3. Brock Phoenix
Brock, a name you wish you could have. He's a young rookie, but has more TPE than the #2 guy. He's maxed out his Arm and Accuracy. He even has max hands and tackling, so expect him to do a lot more on defense this season. He's on a pass heavy team too, and he's also abusing the 99 speed glitch. This makes for an amazing combination of running yards and passing yards that will make you get so many fantasy points.
4. Franklin Armstrong
He's at 1000 freaking TPE. He won 3 Ultimus and like 3 MVPs. He's such a beast. He's an abuser of the 79 speed glitch too, so expect him to be carrying this team on the back. He's got amazing WRs in Hugh Mongo and Jeffrey Phillips. Amazing star studded WR group right there. This is a no brainer.
5. Wolfie McDummy
The man who won the Ultimus last season. He has the most TPE out of all QBs right now, and he's an absolute beast. He's also controlled by an HO member, so expect some cheating to happen. I'm sure infinite pays off the sim team occasionally to get his stats to be better, so you're getting a lot if you draft this dude. Unfortunately, he is pretty old, so that sucks.
6. Monterey Jack
The best rookie QB on a really good team, the San Jose SaberCats. This team is the real deal. They have 2 good WRs in Action Jackson and HeHateMe PickSix. Their other 2 WRs are also pretty good, but nowhere near the level of Action and PickSix. Ty Hood and DTF (Down to Fuck??)
RB
1. Mako Mendonca
Top RB on a run heavy team. This guy is coming off of a strong season where he finished 2nd in MVP voting. They have the top OL too.
2. Baby Yoda
Arizona has around 3 human OL, so expect them to run the ball. They can't trust their garbage QB, Cue, cause he sucks and fumbles the ball too much.
3. Marcella Toriki
Bex is the commish, so she definitely is blackmailing the simmers. Toriki is a solid pick. I think NOLA has another RB, but he sucks, so don't even think about picking him. Gore Pump or something?
4. Mathias Hanyadi
Some people are saying this dude is the #1 pick, don't listen to them, it's literally just Wraiths players. Their QB is too good for them to run a lot. And their OL sucks. And he retired
5. Ruff Ruff
to be honest, I don't even know which team this guy is on. Oh, its hahalua. Ok hahalua QB sucks, so pick this guy.
6. Dax Frost
Frost is a GM, so expect him to give himself 50 carries a game.
7. Acura Skyline
Acura, Acura, Acura. The best rookie RB, who's not actually a rookie. Expect this person to get a lot of carries. They won OROTY last year, and expect them to do it again.
8. Darrell Williams
Who is this guy? No one knows. He's a S10 player, so he's around 150 TPE. But he's abusing the S10 glitch, so he'll probably do very well.
9. Tatsu Nakamura
Tatsu! He is the only OCO RB, so he will get a lot of carries.
10. Sam Torenson
The bellcow of the Philly offense, except he got traded to the butchers and then retired. But expect him to still do well.
WR
1. Bender B. Rodriguez
A 1500 TPE rookie, wtf!!! He won MVP last season, so expect him to break all records in this 16 game season.
2. Net Gaines
The best Austin WR for the last couple of years.
3. Rayne Gordon
Another GM player, so expect him to get a lot of catches, as he schemes himself open every play.
4. Action Jackson
This Arizona WR will do very well with Cue, especially after I tampered him here.
5. Sean O’Leary
With over 896 TPE to his name, he's probably the best Butchers player, so pick him. Unless Valor trades him for a S24 3rd rounder.
6. Nacho Varga
The highest TPE WR in the NSFL. What a beast.
7. Saba Donut
He takes PEDs
8. Hugh Mongo
He has Armstrong on his team.
9. Jed Podolak
He's on Hahalua
10. Deondre-Thomas Fox
The highest TPE WR on SJS. Top target for a Top QB.
TE
1. Heath Evans
Plays at TE, and is the only Arizona TE. Since all of Arizona's WRs suck, expect them to throw to this guy a lot.
2. Jeffrey Phillips
Since all of OCO's WR suck, expect Armstrong to target Phillips a lot. This guy got 2nd in ORotY last year.
3. Leon McDavid
With over 200 TPE to his name, he's already a beast.
4. Earl Sauce
Bagel has emote power
5. Austin McCormick
Austin Copperheads
6. Avon Blocksdale Jr.
He blocks a lot
K
1. Silver Banana
He kicks a lot because his team can never finish drives
2. Lefty Louis
He has a lot of TPE
3. Dougie Smalls
He is on a terrible team that can never finish drives
4. Herbert Prohaska
He has the most TPE out of all kickers
5. Alfredo Crisco
Pays off simmers
6. Alex Dasistwirklichseinnachname
Sim loves him
D/ST
1. Colorado Yeti
They have Mamba Magic. 'Nuff said.
2. Arizona Outlaws
They have the best CB in the league, Zamir Kehla.
3. Orange County Otters
They have the 2nd best CB in the league, AJ Lattimer. He won DPoY last year.
4. Honolulu Hahalua
They have the best DT in the league, Phat Boi.
5. Austin Copperheads
They have the best LB in the league, Awkward SexJoke.
6. San Jose Sabercats
They have the best CB in the league, HeHateMe PickSix
And I hope this helped you.
*Fantasy Football Rankings - Warner - 06-09-2020
sabercats dont have jackson anymore
5.7/10 funny rating
*Fantasy Football Rankings - SabaDonutMan - 06-09-2020
(06-09-2020, 11:26 AM)retrospace111 Wrote:7. Saba Donut
He takes PEDs
you werent supposed to talk about that
*Fantasy Football Rankings - BenDover - 06-09-2020
100% accurate, I used this and got the most fantasy points ever!1!11!!!!!111!!
*Fantasy Football Rankings - CLG Rampage - 06-09-2020
I retired? That's news to me
*Fantasy Football Rankings - retrospace111 - 06-09-2020
(06-09-2020, 11:36 AM)CLG Rampage Wrote:I retired? That's news to me
yeah sorry YKW Doesn't need you anymore
*Fantasy Football Rankings - CLG Rampage - 06-09-2020
(06-09-2020, 11:43 AM)retrospace111 Wrote:yeah sorry YKW Doesn't need you anymore
Shame
*Fantasy Football Rankings - iseedoug - 06-09-2020
Dang, throwing shade at my team and complementing me at the same time.
But I should be #1.
*Fantasy Football Rankings - TeyonSchavari - 06-09-2020
I subscribe to this timeline where Lattimer won DPOTY
*Fantasy Football Rankings - Moosecop - 06-09-2020
Thanks for this, def winning my group ez now