09-11-2021, 02:05 AM
(This post was last modified: 09-13-2021, 11:58 PM by Tesla. Edited 1 time in total.)
We are delighted to have the opportunity to catch up with an SMJHL legend, Four Star Cup Champion, and the new DSFL draftee Pasta the Turtle. Hockey's favourite reptile has decided to try his hand at football, and after a tumultuous season at the University of Newfoundland he has finally reached the vaunted ranks of the DSFL. The hockey defenceman, citing boredom during a long SHL offseason (sims wen?) decided to move from blocking hockey pucks to blocking defensive lineman. The struggling University of Newfoundland was delighted to have the hulking figure join their offensive line, and indeed fans grew to love his penchant for burying opponents in the dirt. While this, unfortunately, did not translate into much success on the scoreboard it did catch the eye of DSFL scouts.
Indeed the London Royals decided to try out Pasta the Turtle on the blind side. Pasta's audition at left tackle resulted in a continuation of his success. 20 pancakes and only 1 sack allowed in only 5 games certainly turned some heads. In fact, it landed Pasta on the DSFL all star team at Offensive line, despite stiff competition from the plethora of other offensive linemen vying for the award. Unfortunately, his heroics on the field did little to translate into a winning record, with the Royals falling short in each of Pasta's appearances. While Pasta was enjoying his offseason sport, he found something was lacking...
The lead up to the DSFL draft saw Pasta being courted by most of the teams in the DSFL. COnversation topics varied, and Pasta was intrigued by the variety of destinations that were available to him. Life on the East coast of Canada was fantastic, but Pasta was eager to explore. Indeed he had the opportunity to explore many other locker rooms, and while there were many that were interesting and enticing, there was one that stood above the rest. As fate would have it, The Portland Pythons, a team across the continent, was the team that drafted Pasta 5th overall. We are lucky to have an exclusive one on one interview with the newest member of the pythons right here, exclusive on the Reptile Sports Network.
RSN: First of all, congratulations on being drafted so high. Were you surprised?
Pasta: Thank you, and yes absolutely. There was definitely a team I was looking forward to going to, but I certainly didn't expect to go so high. I had very productive talks with a few guys from the franchise, including a @TubbyTim69 who is a guy that I have so much respect for. A true honour to even be associated with him.
RSN: That's great to hear. So tell me what it is about the Python's that has you so excited?
Pasta: Well I think this is a team that really gets us reptiles, you know? Pythons and snakes in general have always been such fun cousins, and it's so important to be in a locker room that lets you be you. Sometimes locker rooms will get weirded out when you start to shed skin, or eat live insects. The guys in Portland get it. Its so comfortable, and the team has welcomed me with warm nd open arms.
RSN: You've been quite an advocate for animal rights in the SHL. Do you see a similar specist attitude in the ISFL?
Pasta: It's early to say, but my experience with the Royals and now the Pythons have been very inclusive. They have gone out of their way to ensure that a shell scrubber is available for me at half time as well as after practice. They outfitted my stall with a heat mat, as well as a heat lamp to bask in. These are things that I had to fight for in the SHL that the Portland team understood right away.
RSN: While your individual success speaks for itself, team success is something that has long escaped you. Do you have any thoughts on that?
Pasta: You know, talking to the guys at Portland, they...you know they watch tape, they looked at my combine results, they been doing this for a while. They told me they wanted to draft me as an athlete, but that they thought maybe I was playing out of position. Maybe my athletic profile wasn't being maximized, and that probably hurt overall team success early in my career
RSN: So what are you saying? Is a position change imminent for you?
Pasta: Yea I mean... I think I'm good to announce it here. I'm going to be switching to a pass rushing linebacker.
RSN: WOW that is quite the change
Pasta: Ya but it makes sense I think. For starters, I think my experience on the o-line will prepare me. Knowing what the other guy is thinking, how he's gonna react. That's half the battle. And then the rest is just using my innate abilities
RSN: what do you mean?
Pasta: well people assume turtles are slow plodders. What people don't get is that over short distances, we are really quick. And that the shell makes it damn near impossible to block me. The coaches have me working on a spin move where I retract my arms, legs and head, and that has proven impossible to block. Linemen are either holding me, or watching me put the QB in the dirt.
RSN: Well that is quite the breaking story. We eagerly anticipate the start of the season and can't wait to have a look at you in your new position!
Pasta: Thanks, guys. Always appreciate your work and your advocacy. #ReptileRights
Indeed the London Royals decided to try out Pasta the Turtle on the blind side. Pasta's audition at left tackle resulted in a continuation of his success. 20 pancakes and only 1 sack allowed in only 5 games certainly turned some heads. In fact, it landed Pasta on the DSFL all star team at Offensive line, despite stiff competition from the plethora of other offensive linemen vying for the award. Unfortunately, his heroics on the field did little to translate into a winning record, with the Royals falling short in each of Pasta's appearances. While Pasta was enjoying his offseason sport, he found something was lacking...
The lead up to the DSFL draft saw Pasta being courted by most of the teams in the DSFL. COnversation topics varied, and Pasta was intrigued by the variety of destinations that were available to him. Life on the East coast of Canada was fantastic, but Pasta was eager to explore. Indeed he had the opportunity to explore many other locker rooms, and while there were many that were interesting and enticing, there was one that stood above the rest. As fate would have it, The Portland Pythons, a team across the continent, was the team that drafted Pasta 5th overall. We are lucky to have an exclusive one on one interview with the newest member of the pythons right here, exclusive on the Reptile Sports Network.
RSN: First of all, congratulations on being drafted so high. Were you surprised?
Pasta: Thank you, and yes absolutely. There was definitely a team I was looking forward to going to, but I certainly didn't expect to go so high. I had very productive talks with a few guys from the franchise, including a @TubbyTim69 who is a guy that I have so much respect for. A true honour to even be associated with him.
RSN: That's great to hear. So tell me what it is about the Python's that has you so excited?
Pasta: Well I think this is a team that really gets us reptiles, you know? Pythons and snakes in general have always been such fun cousins, and it's so important to be in a locker room that lets you be you. Sometimes locker rooms will get weirded out when you start to shed skin, or eat live insects. The guys in Portland get it. Its so comfortable, and the team has welcomed me with warm nd open arms.
RSN: You've been quite an advocate for animal rights in the SHL. Do you see a similar specist attitude in the ISFL?
Pasta: It's early to say, but my experience with the Royals and now the Pythons have been very inclusive. They have gone out of their way to ensure that a shell scrubber is available for me at half time as well as after practice. They outfitted my stall with a heat mat, as well as a heat lamp to bask in. These are things that I had to fight for in the SHL that the Portland team understood right away.
RSN: While your individual success speaks for itself, team success is something that has long escaped you. Do you have any thoughts on that?
Pasta: You know, talking to the guys at Portland, they...you know they watch tape, they looked at my combine results, they been doing this for a while. They told me they wanted to draft me as an athlete, but that they thought maybe I was playing out of position. Maybe my athletic profile wasn't being maximized, and that probably hurt overall team success early in my career
RSN: So what are you saying? Is a position change imminent for you?
Pasta: Yea I mean... I think I'm good to announce it here. I'm going to be switching to a pass rushing linebacker.
RSN: WOW that is quite the change
Pasta: Ya but it makes sense I think. For starters, I think my experience on the o-line will prepare me. Knowing what the other guy is thinking, how he's gonna react. That's half the battle. And then the rest is just using my innate abilities
RSN: what do you mean?
Pasta: well people assume turtles are slow plodders. What people don't get is that over short distances, we are really quick. And that the shell makes it damn near impossible to block me. The coaches have me working on a spin move where I retract my arms, legs and head, and that has proven impossible to block. Linemen are either holding me, or watching me put the QB in the dirt.
RSN: Well that is quite the breaking story. We eagerly anticipate the start of the season and can't wait to have a look at you in your new position!
Pasta: Thanks, guys. Always appreciate your work and your advocacy. #ReptileRights
