So you're telling me that you haven't already seen the movies that are based on my life? I thought they were super popular. The first one is about me in the present day after I was presumed dead in World War II. I was fighting alongside my squad, The Howling Commandos, when I fell off a moving train and was found alive but missing an arm by some Russian soldiers. They took me in, gave me a sick ass metal arm, brainwashed me, and turned me into a super assassin, sleeper agent for them for the next 70 years. It wasn't until I came to face to face with an old friend from back then who did everything in his power to get me to remember my life before being brainwashed. At this point, I just want to be left alone so I never have to kill anyone ever again but now I'm being hunted by the UN for all the crimes I've committed in the past, including a bombing that killed the Wakandan king that I surprisingly didn't actually do. I'm not going to tell you the rest because you should really watch it for yourself, they're awesome movies. Look out for me, they call me The Winter Soldier in them.

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