Robbed:
I think it is blatantly obvious to anyone with a set of eyes that the Philadelphia Liberty were absolutely robbed of their playoff chances that they so obviously deserve. Let me go down a quick couple-pointed list of mine as to why this team sent down to us by the lord above was unjustly robbed of their opportunity to face off against the Colorado Yeti in the NSFC semifinals. That's right posers, I said face off against the Yeti and not those stinky Hawks and their team that despite going 9-5 is apparently a trashy team or something. So my first comment that needs to be addressed is the absolute god known as Marquise Brown that is simply a better person than all of us could ever aspire to be. If he isn't jerking himself off 24/7 in the public Discord and shitting on established veterans, he's running TDs for the Liberty and later jerking himself off in the endzone, as is tradition of course. I guarantee you that Brown has one of the most marvelous three inch penises that you will ever see. He'll be like Lyndon B Johnson and whip it out whenever someone attacks his authority to display dominance. My second point is of course the locker room cancers. I'm not one to pick out names because I'm a good boy, but if there's any way in the world I want to attract free agents to this shit-hole of a franchise to try to make it good, it's gathering all of the cancers together in one place. Absolutely robbed. Oh right, Brown is also a weeb and they have elite perks of society so of course playoff bound.
Playoff Series MVP:
As a member of the Baltimore Hawks or at least one of their recent draftees who will be a member of them this season after honing my big boy defensive abilities down with the Portland Pythons, I feel obliged to write about the game where we enjoyed very nice success. In the NSFC semifinals game against the Colorado Yeti, the Hawks absolutely swept the floor with them, scoring 45 points while limiting the Yeti to only 7 points throughout the game, all 7 being scored in the first quarter. Call me an index-loving box score pansy, but I think it'd be crazy to pick anyone but Hawks quarterback Ryan Applehort as the MVP of that game. Usually quarterbacks hold the special interest of typically being the MVP because they control every single offensive play of the game, but Applehort's 410 yards against a team that went 8-6 on the season is surely something special. Especially considering that the defensive MVP according to the index was a member of the Yetis, it's really huge that Applehort was able to pull off those 410 yards with his team as well as four touchdowns. Of course that one interception is never fun to look at but considering everything else he had done, he wholeheartedly deserves the MVP award for this playoff game.
Going to Disneyland:
Since I wrote about the MVP of the NSFC semifinal game, I guess it's pretty okay for me to give a quick blurb on my rationale for the MVP of the Ultimus game before getting into what the aforementioned MVP did on his trip to Disneyland. Once again, I'm going to be an index-loving box score pansy and say that Borkus Maximus III was the undisputed MVP of the game. Despite only having 33 completions in 51 attempts which isn't as good of a completion rate of Applehort in the semifinals game that I covered in my last MVP discussion, those exactly 400 yards paired with four touchdowns was marvelous and instrumental in winning the Second Line another championship. That's moreso true considering the game eventually came down to the wire with Borkus himself throwing the pass in overtime that would score a touchdown and win the game for NOLA. Regarding the trip to Disneyland, who can really go to Disneyland without taking a nice trip to Magical Kingdom and meeting with Mickey Mouse and having a breakfast with the princesses. It fits out perfectly because Borkus Maximus III is royalty himself so he fits right in with them. Actually, it might've all actually just been a hallucinogenic dream that he had while under mushrooms, but hell if I really know.
PBE PT
I think it is blatantly obvious to anyone with a set of eyes that the Philadelphia Liberty were absolutely robbed of their playoff chances that they so obviously deserve. Let me go down a quick couple-pointed list of mine as to why this team sent down to us by the lord above was unjustly robbed of their opportunity to face off against the Colorado Yeti in the NSFC semifinals. That's right posers, I said face off against the Yeti and not those stinky Hawks and their team that despite going 9-5 is apparently a trashy team or something. So my first comment that needs to be addressed is the absolute god known as Marquise Brown that is simply a better person than all of us could ever aspire to be. If he isn't jerking himself off 24/7 in the public Discord and shitting on established veterans, he's running TDs for the Liberty and later jerking himself off in the endzone, as is tradition of course. I guarantee you that Brown has one of the most marvelous three inch penises that you will ever see. He'll be like Lyndon B Johnson and whip it out whenever someone attacks his authority to display dominance. My second point is of course the locker room cancers. I'm not one to pick out names because I'm a good boy, but if there's any way in the world I want to attract free agents to this shit-hole of a franchise to try to make it good, it's gathering all of the cancers together in one place. Absolutely robbed. Oh right, Brown is also a weeb and they have elite perks of society so of course playoff bound.
Playoff Series MVP:
As a member of the Baltimore Hawks or at least one of their recent draftees who will be a member of them this season after honing my big boy defensive abilities down with the Portland Pythons, I feel obliged to write about the game where we enjoyed very nice success. In the NSFC semifinals game against the Colorado Yeti, the Hawks absolutely swept the floor with them, scoring 45 points while limiting the Yeti to only 7 points throughout the game, all 7 being scored in the first quarter. Call me an index-loving box score pansy, but I think it'd be crazy to pick anyone but Hawks quarterback Ryan Applehort as the MVP of that game. Usually quarterbacks hold the special interest of typically being the MVP because they control every single offensive play of the game, but Applehort's 410 yards against a team that went 8-6 on the season is surely something special. Especially considering that the defensive MVP according to the index was a member of the Yetis, it's really huge that Applehort was able to pull off those 410 yards with his team as well as four touchdowns. Of course that one interception is never fun to look at but considering everything else he had done, he wholeheartedly deserves the MVP award for this playoff game.
Going to Disneyland:
Since I wrote about the MVP of the NSFC semifinal game, I guess it's pretty okay for me to give a quick blurb on my rationale for the MVP of the Ultimus game before getting into what the aforementioned MVP did on his trip to Disneyland. Once again, I'm going to be an index-loving box score pansy and say that Borkus Maximus III was the undisputed MVP of the game. Despite only having 33 completions in 51 attempts which isn't as good of a completion rate of Applehort in the semifinals game that I covered in my last MVP discussion, those exactly 400 yards paired with four touchdowns was marvelous and instrumental in winning the Second Line another championship. That's moreso true considering the game eventually came down to the wire with Borkus himself throwing the pass in overtime that would score a touchdown and win the game for NOLA. Regarding the trip to Disneyland, who can really go to Disneyland without taking a nice trip to Magical Kingdom and meeting with Mickey Mouse and having a breakfast with the princesses. It fits out perfectly because Borkus Maximus III is royalty himself so he fits right in with them. Actually, it might've all actually just been a hallucinogenic dream that he had while under mushrooms, but hell if I really know.
PBE PT
