(S17) - PT3 - AB is crazy

[IsaStarcrossed]

I need out and I need out now. This team isn't anywhere near competing in the league and I'm here to win championships. It's timing to put on our thinking caps and get to work. Lets start by refusing to show up for practice. Ever. After all, I'm not planning to stick around so why should I get used to playing for these teammates? Lets always show up late for team meetings and when you finally do show up, make a spectacle out of it. Distract everyone, get them focused on you instead of the task at hand. After all, these people sabotaged your career, so why not sabotage their efforts to make any improvements? In between practice sessions, show up and prank those still on the team. Make small cuts to laces on their equipment so it comes apart easy when they use it. Rub their pads down with Vaseline to make them hard to grip or put on. Do everything in your power to make it harder on others to practice as well. Even with that, we know who we are. We're a superstar, a big name, an impact player. We're who puts fans in their seats, we're who makes this organization money. Despite all of this, they're still going to let us play. They can't afford not to. So go out there and get penalties early and often. The dirtier, the better. get your late hits, get your cheap shots, start as many fights as you can. No one likes a dirty player. Between your penalties crippling the team and the fans turning on you, soon enough they'll have no choice. Soon enough you'll be free. Soon enough we can move to the next team and do it all over again.