(S17) - PT3 - AB is crazy

[slothfacekilla]

Code:

Written Option: You are a diva and you want out. You also happen to be a crazy person. What crazy things do you do? Burn your feet, demand new helmets, go all over social media? I don’t want anyone to throw their current team under the bus, this is purely hypothetical. Write about the experience and craziness that comes with being an NSFL diva! What would you do to demand a trade or make your team realize you just aren't worth the hassle?

This is my kind of PT! I actually considered doing all of this prior to the season before this after the New Orleans Second line would not let me switch to Quarterback. I can throw a ball over those mountains but the management wanted me to stay as a linebacker.

First, I was going to claim that I messed up my back in a freak cupping accident. Through no fault of my own I would blame it all on the person who did the cupping, and I would claim that I need a backiotomy to fix the damage done so I would not be able to play at the beginning of the season. Next, I was going to break into the team's practice facility and drop an upper decker in every single toilet in the facility. It does not matter if it would take me all night, eating numerous fiber bars. I would get that shit done, pun intended. Then, I would hang around until someone discovered them... and blame it all on the general manager! If they tried to force me to practice or play, even with my fake back injury, I would insist that I now wear my cleats on my hands and run around in a hand stand type pose. Sure I don't move as quickly, but I would claim that by kicking the opposing team in the eyes with my feet I am inflicting psychological warfare. I also would be fully nude, except for the cleats on my hands of course.

I ultimately decided not to do this though, I figured it may end up getting me involuntarily committed to the looney bin instead of released from the team.