09-24-2019, 09:38 AM
(This post was last modified: 09-27-2019, 09:55 AM by BroicSilence.)
1) Playoff Review
Before the Ultimus sim was aired, I wrote that I thought Baltimore Hawks quarterback Corvo Havran would vastly outplay the Orange County Otters quarterback Franklin Armstrong. After all, Havran was a dark horse MVP candidate and arguably had the best season of any quarterback in the league. Now that the championship is over though, I must admit that I was absolutely wrong about that. The Ultimus was an exciting game with many standout performers, but it was Franklin that shined the most. By the time the fourth quarter ended, Franklin had put up 287 yards (completing 17 out of 27 passes) and three touchdowns, good for an amazing passer rating of 135.9.
The game started as a shootout, which itself was somewhat surprising. After all, the Hawks had two spectacular wide receivers in Sunnycursed and Maddox to go along with their seemingly superior quarterback. But it would be the Otters who would draw first blood, as Franklin scored a touchdown on the opening drive. The Hawks responded with a touchdown of their own immediately after. A missed field goal by Baltimore after a clutch sack by Lanzer Grievous prevented the Hawks from pulling ahead. By a few minutes into the third quarter, the teams were tied 14-14. This would be the beginning of the end for the Hawks, as the Otters put up two more touchdowns compared to a single field goal for Baltimore.
[Word Count: 234]
3) All About the QBs
With the Baltimore Hawks and the Orange County Otters being the last teams standing in the race for the Ultimus championship, fans can look forward to an exciting game with an interesting quarterback match up that includes a player in just his first year of playing in the NSFL and a player who is a dark horse MVP candidate.
Playing for the Baltimore Hawks will be celebrated quarterback Corvo Havran. Havran has had an exciting season so far. He put up 3,590 yards passing, good for fourth in the league, and did so with a 59.8% completion percentage that also is fourth highest this season. What is most impressive; however, are the scoring numbers he produced. He ended the season with 31 touchdowns (tied for most in the league) and a mere 11 interceptions. Ultimately, these numbers plus his league-leading passer rating of 95.5 shows just how dominant he was at the quarterback position.
Franklin Armstrong, in his first year starting in the NSFL, will be leading the Otters in this match up. As one might expect from a player that still fairly young, his numbers are not quite as impressive as Havran’s. He was eighth in the league in passing yards (3191), fifth in touchdowns (23), third in most interceptions (13), and ninth in passer rating (78.2). Unfortunately, his most glaring weakness was his accuracy. He completed a mere 53.5% of passes which places him last in the league.
Given the experience and talent of these two quarterbacks, it is fairly safe to say that Havran will probably have the better game. But Armstrong should take some pride in making it this far and clearly has a bright future ahead of him.
[Word Count: 283]
10) Rivalries
Hot take: The Portland Pythons are a national disgrace and will lose to the Tijuana Luchadores in the championship without question. Yes, I have heard all of the hype and never in my life have I seen a DSFL team that is so outrageously overrated. They lost by two scores to the paltry Palm Beach Solar Bears for crying out loud. Sure they might have the “number one offense” in terms of yards. When you take a look at their points scored though...oh. They have the number one offense in points scored as well. That’s fine though because it doesn’t matter how explosive your offense is if your defense is made of wet tissue paper. The Luchadores will be able to tear through them at will. After all, the Pythons have merely the...oh come on! This is ridiculous! They have the number one defense too?! In both yards AND points?
Some might wonder why a player from the illustrious Norfolk SeaWolves would even consider the Pythons as a rival team. There are two reasons for this. First, we are in the same conference. Second, we had some incredibly competitive games this season. This includes...woof...a 13 point Norfolk loss, a 14 point Norfolk loss, a 25 point Norfolk loss, and a 41 point Norfolk loss.
So the Pythons may not actually be overrated. But I still would like for them to lose on the grounds of them hurting my feelings.
[Word Count: 239]
19) Kickers are people too!
When it comes to American football, the spotlight is always on the big name, flashy, offensive players: the quarterbacks, the running backs, the wide receivers. In some instances defensive players are also highlighted, but only if they are regularly putting up exciting stats like sacks and interceptions. The rest of the players are often unheralded and we are focusing on one of these such players today. No, not the robot offensive linemen or the non-existent long snappers. Today we are focusing on the humble kicker. And in this season’s NSFL wildcard round, there was possibly no kicker more notable than the great Kulture Fulture.
There are many ways to describe the 40-6 Baltimore victory over Chicago. Some words, such as “exciting,” “entertaining,” or “close,” do not apply here. It was an unmitigated beatdown. But as his team was getting annihilated around him, one man, or rather, one hero, stood tall. That man was Kulture “the entire scoring offense for Chicago” Fulture. He made not one but TWO field goals, one of which was for a very nice 43 yards. Did this win Chicago the game? No. Did it put the game within Chicago’s reach? No it did not. But there is nothing more beautiful than an individual standing tall in the face of utter destruction and for that I honor the great Kulture Fulture and the many brave kickers who have come before him.
[Word Count: 234]
Before the Ultimus sim was aired, I wrote that I thought Baltimore Hawks quarterback Corvo Havran would vastly outplay the Orange County Otters quarterback Franklin Armstrong. After all, Havran was a dark horse MVP candidate and arguably had the best season of any quarterback in the league. Now that the championship is over though, I must admit that I was absolutely wrong about that. The Ultimus was an exciting game with many standout performers, but it was Franklin that shined the most. By the time the fourth quarter ended, Franklin had put up 287 yards (completing 17 out of 27 passes) and three touchdowns, good for an amazing passer rating of 135.9.
The game started as a shootout, which itself was somewhat surprising. After all, the Hawks had two spectacular wide receivers in Sunnycursed and Maddox to go along with their seemingly superior quarterback. But it would be the Otters who would draw first blood, as Franklin scored a touchdown on the opening drive. The Hawks responded with a touchdown of their own immediately after. A missed field goal by Baltimore after a clutch sack by Lanzer Grievous prevented the Hawks from pulling ahead. By a few minutes into the third quarter, the teams were tied 14-14. This would be the beginning of the end for the Hawks, as the Otters put up two more touchdowns compared to a single field goal for Baltimore.
[Word Count: 234]
3) All About the QBs
With the Baltimore Hawks and the Orange County Otters being the last teams standing in the race for the Ultimus championship, fans can look forward to an exciting game with an interesting quarterback match up that includes a player in just his first year of playing in the NSFL and a player who is a dark horse MVP candidate.
Playing for the Baltimore Hawks will be celebrated quarterback Corvo Havran. Havran has had an exciting season so far. He put up 3,590 yards passing, good for fourth in the league, and did so with a 59.8% completion percentage that also is fourth highest this season. What is most impressive; however, are the scoring numbers he produced. He ended the season with 31 touchdowns (tied for most in the league) and a mere 11 interceptions. Ultimately, these numbers plus his league-leading passer rating of 95.5 shows just how dominant he was at the quarterback position.
Franklin Armstrong, in his first year starting in the NSFL, will be leading the Otters in this match up. As one might expect from a player that still fairly young, his numbers are not quite as impressive as Havran’s. He was eighth in the league in passing yards (3191), fifth in touchdowns (23), third in most interceptions (13), and ninth in passer rating (78.2). Unfortunately, his most glaring weakness was his accuracy. He completed a mere 53.5% of passes which places him last in the league.
Given the experience and talent of these two quarterbacks, it is fairly safe to say that Havran will probably have the better game. But Armstrong should take some pride in making it this far and clearly has a bright future ahead of him.
[Word Count: 283]
10) Rivalries
Hot take: The Portland Pythons are a national disgrace and will lose to the Tijuana Luchadores in the championship without question. Yes, I have heard all of the hype and never in my life have I seen a DSFL team that is so outrageously overrated. They lost by two scores to the paltry Palm Beach Solar Bears for crying out loud. Sure they might have the “number one offense” in terms of yards. When you take a look at their points scored though...oh. They have the number one offense in points scored as well. That’s fine though because it doesn’t matter how explosive your offense is if your defense is made of wet tissue paper. The Luchadores will be able to tear through them at will. After all, the Pythons have merely the...oh come on! This is ridiculous! They have the number one defense too?! In both yards AND points?
Some might wonder why a player from the illustrious Norfolk SeaWolves would even consider the Pythons as a rival team. There are two reasons for this. First, we are in the same conference. Second, we had some incredibly competitive games this season. This includes...woof...a 13 point Norfolk loss, a 14 point Norfolk loss, a 25 point Norfolk loss, and a 41 point Norfolk loss.
So the Pythons may not actually be overrated. But I still would like for them to lose on the grounds of them hurting my feelings.
[Word Count: 239]
19) Kickers are people too!
When it comes to American football, the spotlight is always on the big name, flashy, offensive players: the quarterbacks, the running backs, the wide receivers. In some instances defensive players are also highlighted, but only if they are regularly putting up exciting stats like sacks and interceptions. The rest of the players are often unheralded and we are focusing on one of these such players today. No, not the robot offensive linemen or the non-existent long snappers. Today we are focusing on the humble kicker. And in this season’s NSFL wildcard round, there was possibly no kicker more notable than the great Kulture Fulture.
There are many ways to describe the 40-6 Baltimore victory over Chicago. Some words, such as “exciting,” “entertaining,” or “close,” do not apply here. It was an unmitigated beatdown. But as his team was getting annihilated around him, one man, or rather, one hero, stood tall. That man was Kulture “the entire scoring offense for Chicago” Fulture. He made not one but TWO field goals, one of which was for a very nice 43 yards. Did this win Chicago the game? No. Did it put the game within Chicago’s reach? No it did not. But there is nothing more beautiful than an individual standing tall in the face of utter destruction and for that I honor the great Kulture Fulture and the many brave kickers who have come before him.
[Word Count: 234]
![[Image: pe9GSX7.png]](https://i.imgur.com/pe9GSX7.png)
