You wanna talk about a bust? How about Johan-James "Jimmy" Slothface Sr. (AKA Big Jimbo Klein).
He got drafted at some point, in some season, in a certain round of the draft at a specific pick. Nobody knows for sure when or how the man entered the league, but what is for sure is that upon retirement he was immediately and totally replaced both on the field and in the hearts of his colleagues by an Orc who had never before seen a football, let alone set foot on a professional football field.
His accomplishments? None. Not even a single field goal to his name. No touchdowns passing or rushing. No punt returns. Nary a pancake to be seen. The man was a practical void on the stat sheet, an enigma, similar to a black hole in that his presence can only be verified by the virtue of the absence of someone better and inherently more exciting.
A lot of Second Line fans weren't aware that he even played for them, and often referred to themselves as the "11th man", mistakenly noting his absence. Somewhere down the road a historian will look back on the NSFL football reference and find him, and wonder if he ever truly existed at all or if he was a figment of the imagination of the writers, or perhaps even a glitch in the archive.
Someone once said, "If you do something right, no one will be certain you did anything at all." - And, perhaps, Johan-James Slothface Sr. lived by that motto.
He got drafted at some point, in some season, in a certain round of the draft at a specific pick. Nobody knows for sure when or how the man entered the league, but what is for sure is that upon retirement he was immediately and totally replaced both on the field and in the hearts of his colleagues by an Orc who had never before seen a football, let alone set foot on a professional football field.
His accomplishments? None. Not even a single field goal to his name. No touchdowns passing or rushing. No punt returns. Nary a pancake to be seen. The man was a practical void on the stat sheet, an enigma, similar to a black hole in that his presence can only be verified by the virtue of the absence of someone better and inherently more exciting.
A lot of Second Line fans weren't aware that he even played for them, and often referred to themselves as the "11th man", mistakenly noting his absence. Somewhere down the road a historian will look back on the NSFL football reference and find him, and wonder if he ever truly existed at all or if he was a figment of the imagination of the writers, or perhaps even a glitch in the archive.
Someone once said, "If you do something right, no one will be certain you did anything at all." - And, perhaps, Johan-James Slothface Sr. lived by that motto.
![[Image: SM8gLr7.png]](https://i.imgur.com/SM8gLr7.png)
