(S3) - Weekend PT #5 - Conspiracies

[Bayley]

Conspiracy? I mean, how do you limit it to just one? But, my theory is that @Muford actually doesn't lick booty either. I mean, in the locker room, there has been talk that says that Smallwood did not deserve his suspension which brought about the accusation of booty licking. Now, what does this have to do with anything? I believe that @Muford and Smallwood's girlfriend is the same person. How would he know about these incidents linking to the personal life of the player? I believe we have a spy in our locker room and I do not like it. I think she is unhappy about Small wood and wants to have the Cats lose every game possible. Also Muford has been definitely angry lately, could it be sexual frustration. I believe that this has to be the case, I mean everything else does not make sense, now does it? Also, Arizona deflates footballs, ER rigs the sim, YKW pays ER to make them lose games, Legion are purposely losing their games, Yeti rigged to lose so Cushing goes to LV. There is a lot of conspiracy, how to limit it to just one? All of these are true and to that I say, you are welcome.

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[Admin]

Draft Day Sports Pro Football 2016 is conspiring against the Yellowknife Wraiths to keep them out of the playoffs. The Wraiths are one of the most talented teams in the National Simulation Football League and yet they continue to lose games they should easily be winning. These losses will keep them out of the playoffs for the first time in their history and it can all be blamed on Draft Day Sports Pro Football 2016.

Just a quick glance at the roster shows how good this team should be, and yet they continue to lose.

Quarterback - Chris Orosz is easily one of the best quarterbacks in the National Simulation Football League. The two time "Top QB" award winner should be leading the Wraiths to one of the best record in the league.

Running back - Bubba Nuck isn't the dominant player he was during Season 1, but he is still a damn good running back and one of the best in the league. With Nuck in the back field for the Wraiths, Orosz should be picking defenses apart while Nuck faces favorable fronts each and every game.

Wide Receivers - Josh Garden, Bailey Cook, and D.J. Law are three receivers who could all be number 1 receivers in the National Simulation Football League. Instead, the three of them under perform game after game during Season 3 for the Yellowknife Wraiths.

That is just a small snapshot of the roster that should be doing much better than it should be doing. It can only be explained through conspiracy theories. That settles it, the sim program Draft Day Sports Pro Football 2016 is conspiring against the Yellowknife Wraiths to make them lose.

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[White Cornerback]

It's been a while since the drama calmed down, claims about a one "Melvin Mushing" arose a few months ago. Horror stories depicting him committing heinous acts such as teasing and bullying another professional NSFL athlete or spying on various team training and practice camps were a plenty.

Following a payoff from the league no less, the drama calmed down and the stories all dried up. That was until today.

NSFL Live can now confirm the identity of the man known previously as "Melvin Mushing" is infact Yellowknife Wraiths star Kevin Cushing. Yes ladies and gentleman, that is correct.
It turns out that the perpetrator of all these league wide scandals and acts was cleverly hidden behind the alias of Melvin Mushing. Such an alias as crudely designed as Melvin Mushing managed to elude everybody researching the scandal at hand.

What punishment will be handed down by the consistently incompetent head office is unknown, if any. Such behavior would not be handled so inefficiently in the NSFL's arch rival league, the EFL. Lord Shaka would have already have declared a shootout at sundown between a member of head office and Kevin Cushing. All praise Lord Shaka and his football sim knowledge.

@kckolbe

[White Cornerback]

Scarface died snorting cocaine,

Scarface didn't die doing cocaine. He was shot by Sosa's assassin during the raid on his mansion. Unless you're talking about Scarface from the Geto Boys, in which case he is still alive and hasn't died from cocaine either.

[Darnellthebeast]

Recent evidence brought to light has shown that universally detested Francois Lemoureax was kidnapped by members of Baltimore Hawks organization. The motive for the kidnapping is clear; Francois Lemoureax, or Archon, was quite possibly the most annoying member in the league during his time in the National Simulation Football League. He constantly attempted to stir up drama, especially with the Hawks, constantly accusing them of cheating even when it wasn't their fault. He liked to bring up Erasmo Broadways extremely agile game, despite the fact that it was in no way the Hawk's fault that Erasmo had incorrect stats. He liked to bring up the drama involving Carmel Gibson and his illegal TPE, despite it again not being the Hawk's fault at all with the blame being on a head office member. These give clear reason for Hawk's members to want to get rid of Archon. A recent surfacing of a recorded tape shows Archon walking by the Baltimore head office while in town for a game. He appears to spray paint a penis on the window, before being confronted by members Avon Blocksdale and Kurt Hendrix. The two grab him and drag him off camera, at which point we can only guess what happens to him.

[37thchamber]

Trey Willie is, in fact, Carmel "Roidson" Gibson. Think about it. Both play receiving roles. Both play for the Hawks. Willie emerged shortly after Roidson disappeared from NSFL, in the wake of his TPE scandal. Nobody has ever seen Roidson and Willie in the same room at the same time...

Surely Trey Willie's performances this season can't just be because he's That Damn Good™ otherwise he would never have fallen out of the top five in the draft. His numbers exceed all reasonable expectation for a rookie wide receiver on a mediocre team, catching passes from a middling quarterback.

Crazy, right? But it sure makes more sense than the idea that Scrub Kyubee is a good quarterback, or the Hawks are a good team. I mean, come on. It's not like they were the last team to beat the Outlaws in a competitive game both home and away, or anything impressive like that. Though they probably should have, since they have Trey "Juiced Up" Willie, aka Carmel "Roidson" Gibson catching passes out there. In fact, the entire roster is probably juicing. Think about it. Stormblessed was hot garbage in Las Vegas, shows up in Baltimore and all of a sudden is getting 100+ yard games? Last season Erasmo Broadway was dominating out of nowhere -- did you see that guy in season one?! -- offensive lineman Avon Blocksdale was stacking pancakes like it was breakfast, and Sandoval got THREE sacks. I mean, three? What madness is this?

Clearly the Hawks are doped up. And their dealer is Trey "Juiced Up" Willie aka Carmel "Roidson" Gibson, first ballot entrant to the NSFL Hall of Infamy.

[jordan327]

[cosbornballboy]

Scarface didn't die doing cocaine. He was shot by Sosa's assassin during the raid on his mansion. Unless you're talking about Scarface from the Geto Boys, in which case he is still alive and hasn't died from cocaine either.

That's what the government wants you to think.

(I also got my info from John Mulaney, so take it up with him)

[4D Chess]

Are we really supposed to believe that the puppet mastery of Bzerkap stopped after his two-game suspension? Does the head office of the National Sim Football League take us to be fools? I have it on good authority, from Alex Jones himself, that Bzerkap is in fact every single member of the Head Office including Ballerstorm. Using advanced technology developed in the frozen tundra and seclusion of Yellowknife, the "Wraith GM" has harnessed the power of the human mind and can take over people's lives if he so choose. To divert attention away from this fact he has purposely made the Wraith a complete scrub team so that suspicions aren't raised. That's why they are consistently so mediocre, just good enough to make you think he's trying but just bad enough to keep suspicion limited. But I'm breaking this story wide open: In fact, in reality Bzerkap is also all three members of the Outlaws front office -- yes you read that right, Bzerkap is the simmer Er and our head GM Adwyer -- and yes, he's even me. He's controlling me, and I can't get him out of my head. Every once in awhile I regain control of my thoughts before bzerkap yanks the reigns away, I'm begging you -- stop this man! STOP HIM AND LET THE NATIONAL SIM FOOTBALL LEAGUE GO FREE.

[luchalibre]