As someone informed me in the comments of my last post, kickers are also, technically, people, and so I should probably rate the two prospects we have in this pool.
Now, I'm going to be frank, I feel that this is a waste of time, because one of these two is just so much better than the other one. Jack Burton, simply put, has the skills to become the best kicker the league has ever seen. His range is magnificent, and I'd bet my life on his ability to make a kick under 40 yards. Simply put, Jake Fencik cannot compare in the slightest. His kicks are shaky, his range lacking, and I see the seeds of a bust in him.
Oh, the stats? You want to see their attributes? Alright, the most important attributes for kickers are kick power and kick accuracy. The only other secondary stat that matters is endurance.
Jack Burton (74 kp, 72 ka)
Jake Fencik (74 kp, 72 ka)
Now, some people will tell me that these look like the exact same stats. And you're completely right. So then, why do I rate Jack Burton so much more highly? Is it their secondary stat, endurance? No, both have 65 endurance. Is it the names? Do I like Jack Burton as a name that much more than Jake Fencik? No, that's not it either. What is it then? It is the secret stats that cannot be changed and cannot be seen, except by the greatest of Mock Draft makers. There are many things that fall into this category, however they are all summed up by the term "intangibles". Simply put, I think, nay, know with absolute certainty that Jack Burton has the intangibles that Jake Fencik completely lacks. The moment Jack has any pressure put onto him, he somehow unlocks a second level that completely demolishes what his stats would have you believe. He makes kicks from 50 yards straight down the middle the moment anyone puts pressure on. With the hostile crowd roaring in his ears, he soars to new heights and finds a way to make his team that much better by making kicks in 10 mph winds while his line completely collapses and the field goal is close to being blocked. Meanwhile, Jake just completely crumbles whenever the slightest bit of pressure is put on. He's the kind of guy that misses a field goal from 38 yards to create a 10 point lead, or shanks a 27 yard field goal for the win, or hits the post and the crossbar on a field goal that eliminates him and his team from the playoffs, or misses a 47 yard field goal in the Ultimus. Jack Burton, to remind you, is the kind of guy to go down in history by kicking 2 field goals in a driving blizzard to win his team a playoff game.
I stake my entire reputation on this. Jack Burton will be the next great kicker in the league and anyone who drafts him should be very pleased with themselves. Meanwhile, whoever drafts Jake Fencik is going to be making a Roberto Aguayo level mistake. If Jack Burton is a bust, I will quit my job and never make another mock draft ever again.
-Mel Kiper Jr.
P.S. No, I've never heard of the name "Jimmy Clausen" before, what are you talking about?
OK, in all seriousness, what am I supposed to do here? We have 2 of the exact same prospect at a position that is apparently only affected by 3 stats, and endurance isn't even that important of a stat there. How else am I supposed to make an article out of it besides channeling my best "bullshit mock draft maker" impression and pretending to know things I can't possibly know?
Oh, you want to know why Jack was the "can't miss prospect" and Fencik was the "bust"? Entirely because Fencik's user was the one to say that kickers were people too on my last post.
(669 words)
Now, I'm going to be frank, I feel that this is a waste of time, because one of these two is just so much better than the other one. Jack Burton, simply put, has the skills to become the best kicker the league has ever seen. His range is magnificent, and I'd bet my life on his ability to make a kick under 40 yards. Simply put, Jake Fencik cannot compare in the slightest. His kicks are shaky, his range lacking, and I see the seeds of a bust in him.
Oh, the stats? You want to see their attributes? Alright, the most important attributes for kickers are kick power and kick accuracy. The only other secondary stat that matters is endurance.
Jack Burton (74 kp, 72 ka)
Jake Fencik (74 kp, 72 ka)
Now, some people will tell me that these look like the exact same stats. And you're completely right. So then, why do I rate Jack Burton so much more highly? Is it their secondary stat, endurance? No, both have 65 endurance. Is it the names? Do I like Jack Burton as a name that much more than Jake Fencik? No, that's not it either. What is it then? It is the secret stats that cannot be changed and cannot be seen, except by the greatest of Mock Draft makers. There are many things that fall into this category, however they are all summed up by the term "intangibles". Simply put, I think, nay, know with absolute certainty that Jack Burton has the intangibles that Jake Fencik completely lacks. The moment Jack has any pressure put onto him, he somehow unlocks a second level that completely demolishes what his stats would have you believe. He makes kicks from 50 yards straight down the middle the moment anyone puts pressure on. With the hostile crowd roaring in his ears, he soars to new heights and finds a way to make his team that much better by making kicks in 10 mph winds while his line completely collapses and the field goal is close to being blocked. Meanwhile, Jake just completely crumbles whenever the slightest bit of pressure is put on. He's the kind of guy that misses a field goal from 38 yards to create a 10 point lead, or shanks a 27 yard field goal for the win, or hits the post and the crossbar on a field goal that eliminates him and his team from the playoffs, or misses a 47 yard field goal in the Ultimus. Jack Burton, to remind you, is the kind of guy to go down in history by kicking 2 field goals in a driving blizzard to win his team a playoff game.
I stake my entire reputation on this. Jack Burton will be the next great kicker in the league and anyone who drafts him should be very pleased with themselves. Meanwhile, whoever drafts Jake Fencik is going to be making a Roberto Aguayo level mistake. If Jack Burton is a bust, I will quit my job and never make another mock draft ever again.
-Mel Kiper Jr.
P.S. No, I've never heard of the name "Jimmy Clausen" before, what are you talking about?
OK, in all seriousness, what am I supposed to do here? We have 2 of the exact same prospect at a position that is apparently only affected by 3 stats, and endurance isn't even that important of a stat there. How else am I supposed to make an article out of it besides channeling my best "bullshit mock draft maker" impression and pretending to know things I can't possibly know?
Oh, you want to know why Jack was the "can't miss prospect" and Fencik was the "bust"? Entirely because Fencik's user was the one to say that kickers were people too on my last post.
(669 words)
![[Image: 5Mrzi23.jpeg]](https://i.imgur.com/5Mrzi23.jpeg)
![[Image: wcWiaSw.gif]](https://i.imgur.com/wcWiaSw.gif)
![[Image: 74556_s.gif]](https://signavatar.com/74556_s.gif)
