11-02-2017, 04:19 PM
(This post was last modified: 11-02-2017, 07:45 PM by timeconsumer.)
[div align=\\\"center\\\"]![[Image: super-troopers-broken-lizard.jpg?w=780]](http://www.indiewire.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/09/super-troopers-broken-lizard.jpg?w=780)
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Rodney Farva, Mac Womack, Archot Ramathorn, Rabbit Roto, and Jeff Foster are coming to the Orange County Otters. Not the real characters or actors, of course. That would be absurd. But close to the same thing. The Otters are bringing in the robot Super Troopers to be their offensive line in season three. How is this possible? Where did robotic movie characters come from?
The answer is that Hollywood has been embracing the silicon transformation that that recently took the NSFL by storm. The same company that manufactures the NSFL's android offensive linemen creates them for the film industry as well. These are mostly used as stunt dummies, allowing directors to do infinitely more complex stunt scenes by using an android built exactly to the actor's likeness. In the case of the Super Troopers, they were built for the planned sequel, Super Troopers 2. So why do the Otters own them now?
Well, when the Otters front office team called up the android manufacturers to order five of their tier 2 offensive line models they were given an interesting sales pitch. Bots and Droids, Inc. told GM Molarpistols that they had five tier 2 models that had been built for the filming, but due to a mistake in the production line they were built on the offensive line platform and not the Hollywood platform. This made these particular bots completely useless for the film studio, as they did not possess the correct machinery, programming, and flame retardant materials needed for stunt work. Instead these were built to be exceptionally strong and durable, but retained the features and voices of the characters.
Faced with such a strange proposal the Orange County Otters GMs had to ask "What's in it for us?" Nothing. Nothing at all. These bots will cost exactly the same as any other tier 2 offensive line bot. They will perform the same. They come with the same level of customization. They just look and talk like the cast of Super Troopers, and they are ready to take back to the training facility today. Faced with such a terrible offer GM Molarpistols had no choice but to follow his gut, and write a check immediately for the blockers and get them shipped off that day.
"I couldn't say no." the GM said in a recent interview when confronted about the questionable purchase. "When you have to replace a left tackle like Angus Winchester there is no possible way you could top him. Unless you replace him with Rod Farva. Sure he'll probably be flagged for 10 unsportsmanlike conduct penalties a game, but we feel that is a worthy risk given the comedic upside."
The androids did not make their debut in last night's preseason games, and we don't expect to be able to see them on the field for Friday night's games either. The Otters are purportedly working very closely with former offensive linemen Angus Winchester and Gregor Clegane to fine tune the settings of their steel and silicon blockers in advance of their regular season home opener against the arch-rival Arizona Outlaws. They didn't seem to express much concern about their bots first real test being in a regular season game against the powerhouse defensive front of Arizona.
"The bots will be ready." Gregor Clegane told us, "We can tell here in the practice facility how well they are operating when lining up one-on-one with JD Boom and George Wright Jr. It will be no different in a live game with all five of them. We are excited to see these elevate our offense and help bring home a championship trophy to Orange County."
Ready for Grading 606 words
Please give $50k to @Molarpistols $250k to @automatic and $500k to @BoltyMcSpeedy for me pretending to ask them questions and get their answers when in reality I made it all up so that you can think that we actually collaborated on this article. $$$CHA-CHING$$$
[/div]Rodney Farva, Mac Womack, Archot Ramathorn, Rabbit Roto, and Jeff Foster are coming to the Orange County Otters. Not the real characters or actors, of course. That would be absurd. But close to the same thing. The Otters are bringing in the robot Super Troopers to be their offensive line in season three. How is this possible? Where did robotic movie characters come from?
The answer is that Hollywood has been embracing the silicon transformation that that recently took the NSFL by storm. The same company that manufactures the NSFL's android offensive linemen creates them for the film industry as well. These are mostly used as stunt dummies, allowing directors to do infinitely more complex stunt scenes by using an android built exactly to the actor's likeness. In the case of the Super Troopers, they were built for the planned sequel, Super Troopers 2. So why do the Otters own them now?
Well, when the Otters front office team called up the android manufacturers to order five of their tier 2 offensive line models they were given an interesting sales pitch. Bots and Droids, Inc. told GM Molarpistols that they had five tier 2 models that had been built for the filming, but due to a mistake in the production line they were built on the offensive line platform and not the Hollywood platform. This made these particular bots completely useless for the film studio, as they did not possess the correct machinery, programming, and flame retardant materials needed for stunt work. Instead these were built to be exceptionally strong and durable, but retained the features and voices of the characters.
Faced with such a strange proposal the Orange County Otters GMs had to ask "What's in it for us?" Nothing. Nothing at all. These bots will cost exactly the same as any other tier 2 offensive line bot. They will perform the same. They come with the same level of customization. They just look and talk like the cast of Super Troopers, and they are ready to take back to the training facility today. Faced with such a terrible offer GM Molarpistols had no choice but to follow his gut, and write a check immediately for the blockers and get them shipped off that day.
"I couldn't say no." the GM said in a recent interview when confronted about the questionable purchase. "When you have to replace a left tackle like Angus Winchester there is no possible way you could top him. Unless you replace him with Rod Farva. Sure he'll probably be flagged for 10 unsportsmanlike conduct penalties a game, but we feel that is a worthy risk given the comedic upside."
The androids did not make their debut in last night's preseason games, and we don't expect to be able to see them on the field for Friday night's games either. The Otters are purportedly working very closely with former offensive linemen Angus Winchester and Gregor Clegane to fine tune the settings of their steel and silicon blockers in advance of their regular season home opener against the arch-rival Arizona Outlaws. They didn't seem to express much concern about their bots first real test being in a regular season game against the powerhouse defensive front of Arizona.
"The bots will be ready." Gregor Clegane told us, "We can tell here in the practice facility how well they are operating when lining up one-on-one with JD Boom and George Wright Jr. It will be no different in a live game with all five of them. We are excited to see these elevate our offense and help bring home a championship trophy to Orange County."
Ready for Grading 606 words
Please give $50k to @Molarpistols $250k to @automatic and $500k to @BoltyMcSpeedy for me pretending to ask them questions and get their answers when in reality I made it all up so that you can think that we actually collaborated on this article. $$$CHA-CHING$$$
![[Image: XSfVUgo.png]](https://i.imgur.com/XSfVUgo.png)
Hank Winchester (S25 - Current) - Scrub
Angus Winchester (S1-S12) - 4x Ultimus Champ - #2 Career Sacks - Hall of Fame
Cooter Bigsby (S14-S23) - S23 Ultimus Champ - #4 Career Yards - #4 Career TDs - 2x MVP - Hall of Fame
![[Image: 21o2feh.jpg]](http://i67.tinypic.com/21o2feh.jpg)
![[Image: Z8kgtkx.gif]](https://i.imgur.com/Z8kgtkx.gif)
