*A.J. Robertson Post-Draft Thoughts

[Nathan_Hall]

Code:

WARNING: You are entering the presence of greatness. You are also entering the presence of a great ego. Close proximity with the ego may have serious consequences, such as brainwashing, spontaneous combustion, etc.

You, my friend have a once-in-a-lifetime chance to..
Bask in the mind of the most egotistic, self-centered, jerkish player to every grace the NSFL.

Another great season for the NSFL, and next year, linebacker AJ Robertson will join the ranks of great players with the Philadelphia Liberty. [DESCRIPTION OF TEAM]

AJ had a great year with the Luchadores, capped off with winning the DSFL championship and running away with the defensive Player of the Game in the DSFL Rookie Bowl. He had 36 tackles in just 4 games and lets not forget...
THIS BABY

Where was I? Oh yeah. It was a memorable season. Yes, I only piggybacked onto the Luchadores success. Yes, I chose the stupidest template. Yes, my player is also stupid. And yes, I got tested for PEDs so often that my arms hurt, but most importantly of all, I had fun. Wait. What? It was supposed to be deeper than that. Yes, most importantly, I won. I'm what you call a sore loser. A bragger. A douchebag. A a-hole. I am all of the above. But most importantly of all, I am here. And because of my gigantic ego, the league will be better off. So, after some due showing-off, I realized that although I am on the fast track to greatness, there are way too many players that are better than me. So AJ Robertson will, in the future, be focusing on improving his endurance, intelligence (gotta get smarter ha), strength, agility, and tackling. Once that happens I will be the GOAT linebacker and will t?a?k?e? o?v?e?r? t?h?e? w?o?r?l?d? win a championship and form a dynasty.

Now enough about me. Lets talk about the draft. I mean obviously, I wasn't drafted high enough. What was I supposed to do besides not be active? Who has the time to do a few updates I mean? Ahem. My agent says to write this: "I (A.J. Robertson) am extremely happy to be drafted by the Liberty and am determined to be the best player I can be. I know this is a new environment but I am confident I will thrive with the Philadelphia Liberty. I know I will enjoy my time with the Liberty along with fellow draftees Lucari Felix, Adriana Falconi (fellow Luchadore), and Achilles Hondo. I also want to thank the Tijuana Luchadores for introducing me to the NSFL and my old GMs as well for taking me."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA [manically laughing]
What a load of crap. Maybe I would've been better off with the Luchadores to be honest... WAIT DON'T TAKE YOUR MONEY BACK I WANT IT.

Well I've been told that there's a possibility that I will have to switch positions, and I do realize that we do have to make compromises on the road to greatness. (WHOEVER STOLE MY SPOT WILL PAY.) Obviously, this is a small bump, and once my competition for a linebacker spot is d?e?a?d? eliminated, then I will continue my quest to becoming the greatest linebacker to ever grace the NSFL. Unless there's somebody better of course. I don't want to do tooo much work. That's not how it works? Well, I'm not stupid for nothing.

There were more than a couple articles that reviewed the draft, but ONLY ONE mentioned me. The horror. Obviously, the league writers do not recognize my greatness. Or my ego. Now that one man who mentioned me obviously did his homework. The guy also noted how hard the Liberty management worked (nice job adam2552!) to get the draft they wanted, and gave them the best available grade for the overall draft.

Here is that great article dissecting how great my team and I am. (Of course the Liberty are only good because they drafted me.) This sympathetic journalist also noted how much of a steal I was at that slot, and that I could've even been a first-round talent. Sigh. Oh, the tragedy. RedCydranth, the poet, the artist, the man with most likely too-much-time on his hands. Here is the work of art:

--CUT--

13.  - AJ Robertson - LB

He showed up later in the year, but his stock rose very fast. Had he joined earlier, he'd been a clear 1st round talent. So, for the Liberty to get this guy in the middle of the 2nd is a steal. He's another I was hoping would slide into OCO's pick. I also would say, had Preza not gone inactive, I think this would have been where she was drafted, rounding out Philly's new offense here, instead of way later.

--CUT--
OVERALL GRADES:

A+
At the end of the first 2 rounds, the Liberty basically have an entire offense and the start of a solid defense. QB, RB, 2 WR, CB and LB. And all 6 of those players have a B+ or higher ranking on my draft sheet. Fan-fucking-tastic.

Oh, I swoon just to read it. This man knows how to do it. Now some of those haters say that I was drafted ahead of my slot just because I had a low TPE. Let me tell you this - I joined the Tijuana Luchadores midseason, resurrected their defense, basically won the DSFL Rookie Bowl, all in half a season. You might say I was extremely lucky. I say it's better to be lucky than good. The doubters say that my activity level won't last. I say as long as there are doubters, I'll be there to prove them wrong. (So, uh, STAY HERE HATERS.) Some might say that I was only drafted because it was a weaker draft for defense. Well what can I say, maybe I scared all the competition off. I definitely DID NOT purposely choose linebacker because it was the weakest position.

I've been told that if I want to make more money, then I have to write more words. There, that's 18 more words. Now 25. I could keep doing this ???? forever. But honestly here, we gotta get to the deep stuff. This is my second league of this type (what do you call this kind of league?), but I've been in other OOTP Online Leagues, which require about the same level of dedication. Because of that I know that I'll be dedicated for a long time. Yes, every dynasty comes to an end. And every player will retire sometime. But I plan to push that off for the longest I can. You'll be hearing the name AJ Robertson for a long time. (Whether it be fans cheering him on or people swearing "that fucking douchebag Robertson"). I am an asshole. I have an ego bigger than Jupiter. But I'll need that to be the GOAT I was meant to be.

Sincerely,
AJ Robertson (aka Nathan Hall); Premier Linebacker, DSFL Champion, Supreme Lucha, Ultimus Douchebag, TPE Hog, Clueless Boi.

Code:

1031 words (Did not count quote)

Yolo. That was fun. Of course this is all a joke. ???? This isn't the real me. Although I have been told I'm a douchebag irl. Well feel free to praise the greatness that is AJ Robertson, insult me, or just read the entire article out loud until your wife/husband/gf/bf/significant other/cat looks at you weird.

And a display of my absolutely obliterating graphics skills:

[DeathOnReddit]

No one ever will reach my ego.

[Nathan_Hall]

That may be true...

But we can try.

[RedCydranth]

I like this guy. Don't leave. Don't change.

[Nathan_Hall]

I like this guy. Don't leave. Don't change.

I will happily oblige

[Beaver]

LUCHA LUCHA