Hello simulated football fans! This is Ike Dongivaduck and this is the Sports Blast Breakdown Hour of Power! Today we have a young up-and-comer, and one of the more exotic :dsfl: prospects in Maximus Chungus. We have been subjected to his hard-to-follow backstory, and after a disappointing run in the Prospect Bowl it's time to Blast [tm] this young man with questions!
ID: You ready kid? Mic working?
MC: Yeah man. Let's do this.
ID: Alright let's get right to it. 1-5 is not what you were expecting I imagine. What went wrong?
MC: I WILL NOT BE BAITED BY YOUR FEEBLE ATTEMPTS TO GET ME TO BELITTLE MY UNDERPERFORMING QUARTERBACK, TINY MAN. I mean, uh, we played our best and stuff. Just couldn't get them wins.
ID: Woah. A lot to unpack there. Speaking of your quarterback...
MC: Man I got nothing to say about Gimmy. He was in the locker room all like "They call me Gimmy the wins!" And then we get out there and...uh....he did his best and stuff I guess.
ID: In week 2, against the Wolfpack, things really seemed to take a turn. One could point at that safety in the endzone where you get blown to kingdom come by Bartowski, and yet Bahktiari is recorded with the sack allowed, for the safety on top of it. And in a game where you lost by 2 points.
MC: I'll level with you. Bartowski's mind-games are next level. I think he's falling asleep, not even set on the line or nothing, almost a full two seconds after the snap before he even rushes at me. We fall back on the bull rush, but he's still contained and I move over to the edge rusher because that's my assignment. Bahki picked him up, for a moment, but man was he ever outmatched. Them dudes were breathing FIRE wanting that safety. When I saw Gimmy roll to his right instead of THROWING THE BALL (like anyone who wants to get drafted would) on the game film, I just sunk. So yeah this really was the turning point because that's kinda when some of us realized what we had to work with here.
ID: So what did you do after that? What could you do?
MC: Man, we focused on the run game obviously. Did you even watch? I don't know why coach kept letting the dude air it out at all, that's straight sadistic. But in practice, we focused on getting bigger, working as a unit, doing some fun skits at lunch time that we can perform for each other (my idea), some quiet meditative yoga so we don't wreck them ACL's. You know, the usual stuff. We didn't give up penalties, the line gave up a total of four sacks (and one more from that weird fullback dude), and we created space in the run game. Just not sure what else we could do. I hope to see some of those boys again after draft time though.
ID: Well, thanks Maximus, for coming down here. I'm sure at least one of us is going to be getting a call from our agent after today!
MC: Hey man anytime. Anytime.
(Ready for grading)
ID: You ready kid? Mic working?
MC: Yeah man. Let's do this.
ID: Alright let's get right to it. 1-5 is not what you were expecting I imagine. What went wrong?
MC: I WILL NOT BE BAITED BY YOUR FEEBLE ATTEMPTS TO GET ME TO BELITTLE MY UNDERPERFORMING QUARTERBACK, TINY MAN. I mean, uh, we played our best and stuff. Just couldn't get them wins.
ID: Woah. A lot to unpack there. Speaking of your quarterback...
MC: Man I got nothing to say about Gimmy. He was in the locker room all like "They call me Gimmy the wins!" And then we get out there and...uh....he did his best and stuff I guess.
ID: In week 2, against the Wolfpack, things really seemed to take a turn. One could point at that safety in the endzone where you get blown to kingdom come by Bartowski, and yet Bahktiari is recorded with the sack allowed, for the safety on top of it. And in a game where you lost by 2 points.
MC: I'll level with you. Bartowski's mind-games are next level. I think he's falling asleep, not even set on the line or nothing, almost a full two seconds after the snap before he even rushes at me. We fall back on the bull rush, but he's still contained and I move over to the edge rusher because that's my assignment. Bahki picked him up, for a moment, but man was he ever outmatched. Them dudes were breathing FIRE wanting that safety. When I saw Gimmy roll to his right instead of THROWING THE BALL (like anyone who wants to get drafted would) on the game film, I just sunk. So yeah this really was the turning point because that's kinda when some of us realized what we had to work with here.
ID: So what did you do after that? What could you do?
MC: Man, we focused on the run game obviously. Did you even watch? I don't know why coach kept letting the dude air it out at all, that's straight sadistic. But in practice, we focused on getting bigger, working as a unit, doing some fun skits at lunch time that we can perform for each other (my idea), some quiet meditative yoga so we don't wreck them ACL's. You know, the usual stuff. We didn't give up penalties, the line gave up a total of four sacks (and one more from that weird fullback dude), and we created space in the run game. Just not sure what else we could do. I hope to see some of those boys again after draft time though.
ID: Well, thanks Maximus, for coming down here. I'm sure at least one of us is going to be getting a call from our agent after today!
MC: Hey man anytime. Anytime.
(Ready for grading)
![[Image: nbi0jtc.jpg]](https://i.imgur.com/nbi0jtc.jpg)
