*NTG's 200% TRUE EXPANSION MOCK MOCK [real]

[NicholasTheGreat]

It is time for the most important and realistic expansion draft in all of the Internation Simulation Football League but first I will add my thought to expansion since every other tom, dick and harry has done so.

The New York Silverbacks
While I wasn’t the biggest fan of sticking an expansion team in the United States, especially after there was emphasis and ‘strong encouragement’ on an international team. However, the branding and logo is amazing and I can’t use my feelings about the place to knock down the branding, it really is top notch.

The Berlin Fire Salamanders
Going international was great and I like the idea of bringing those teams into the league. I also really like the idea of having a logo competition as a community event. However, my main problem with this is the ‘flow’ of the name. In my opinion, the name is pretty cumbersome and could be tweaked. Imagine you are at the debut of the team and there is a chant going “GO BERLIN FIRE SALAMANDERS GO, GO BERLIN FIRE SALAMANDERS GO, GO BERLIN FIRE SALAMANDERS GO”.

So we now move on to the Expansion Draft where the expansion teams have the opportunity to bolster their roster with players before their debut season. Let’s run through a mock.

Round 1 – Pick 1
The New York Silverbacks select:

Bruce Buckley – Offensive Lineman from the Arizona Outlaws.

Bruce Buckley is the reigning Offensive Lineman of the Year and will be a great addition to an expansion team as he has made several pro bowls and won awards before getting close to his peak. Who knows what he will be like when he reaches that point. New York see that and will draft him to be their first official player on the roster.


Round 1 – Pick 2
The Berlin Fire Salamanders select:

Julio Jones – Offensive Lineman from the Arizona Outlaws

Berlin see the Arizona gap closing and decide to pounce before it is too late. They pick up the contentious 2nd best Arizona lineman, picking Julio Jones over Calvin Golladay.

Round 2 – Pick 3
The Berlin Fire Salamanders select:

Edmond Beaver-Dantes – Offensive Lineman from the Austin Copperheads

Berlin pick up an experienced counterpart for Calvin Golloday and get Edmond Beaver-Dantes which is a great get for Berlin to get some experience for their roster.

Round 2 – Pick 4
The New York Silverbacks select:

Hal Fassingit – Offensive Lineman from the Austin Copperheads

New York also pick up the other Austin copperheads offensive lineman who looks to line up at the other tackle position with Calvin Golloday.

Round 3 – Pick 5
The New York Silverbacks select:

Byron Dolls – Offensive Lineman from the Baltimore Hawks

New York make an interesting pick here as they take the other untainted season twenty-two premier offensive lineman in Byron Dolls. Who plays where on this line will seem to be an interesting battle in the pre-season.

Round 3 – Pick 6
The Berlin Fire Salamanders select:

Dick Thunder – Offensive Lineman from the Baltimore Hawks

What a strange pick here as Berlin pick a payer that likely will never make the International Simulation Football League.

Round 4 – Pick 7
The Berlin Fire Salamanders select:

Perry Tucker Jr. – Offensive Lineman from the Chicago Butchers

Tucker is an offensive lineman convert, transforming into one after originally starting as a defensive lineman. Chicago will miss here dearly.

Round 4 – Pick 8
The New York Silverbacks select:

Icebox Riposte – Offensive Lineman from the Chicago Butchers

New York pick one of the brightest prospects from the DSFL to join their team and show they will be a threat in seasons to come.

Round 5 – Pick 9
The New York Silverbacks select:

Dick Thruster – Offensive Lineman from the Colorado Yeti

Another one of the bright prospects in the Developmental Simulation Football League giving New York a bright future on their offensive line.

Round 5 – Pick 10
The Berlin Fire Salamanders select:

I Hop = Offensive Lineman from the Honolulu Hahalua

Round 6 – Pick 11
The Berlin Fire Salamanders select:

Ajay Krishna = Offensive Lineman from the Honolulu Hahalua

I have grouped this two players together in the analysis as they are both extremely perplexing picks as neither is good enough or active enough to make the ISFL. I have no idea why the Berlin Fire Salamanders would hamstring themselves like this as there were much better Hahalua players available in the draft. Maybe the general managers want to give themselves a greater challenge.

Round 6 – Pick 12
The New York Silverback select:

Givussarefarre Rubbe – Offensive Lineman from the New Orleans Second Line

Wow, what a pick. One of the greatest offensive lineman in the history of the International Simulation Football League falls into the laps of the New York Silverback. Will instantly provide a boost to the team.

Round 7 – Pick 13
The New York Silverbacks select:

Dorfus Jimbo Jr – Offensive Lineman from the New Orleans Second Line

Interesting pick here. Jimbo has the potential to be a great lineman but his statistics do not back that up. New York would be hoping for some improvement here.

Round 7 – Pick 14
The Berlin Fire Salamanders select:

Jorcher Minor – Offensive Lineman from the Orange County Otters

Wtf is this. A IA barely earning player. Berlin are just throwing their picks away.

Round 8 – Pick 15
The Berlin Fire Salamanders select:

Douglas Quail – Offensive Lineman from the Orange County Otters

A better pick here as Berlin pick up a known winner as Douglas Quail was the starting left tackle for the Ultimini winning Myrtle Beach Buccaneers in season 21.

Round 8 – Pick 16
The New York Silverbacks select:

Joey McCabe – Offensive Lineman from the Sarasota Sailfish

Average pick as its an average earner coming on a team that has an average general manager. He probably sux [The old GM]

Round 9 – Pick 17
The New York Silverbacks select:

Samuel Bakhtiari – Offensive Lineman from the Sarasota Sailfish

Brings some experience into the team. Decent pick.

Round 9 – Pick 18
The Berlin Fire Salamanders select:

OL Bot – Offensive Lineman from the Colorado Yeti

A Bot…..wtf?

Round 10 – Pick 19
The Berlin Fire Salamanders select:

OL Bot – Offensive Lineman from the San Jose Sabercats

ANOTHER O-LINE BOT, WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?!?!?!? Maybe Berlin just wanted to steal a Sabercat? Who knows. Fire their GM’s.

Round 10 – Pick 20
The New York Silverbacks select:

Laszlo Forty-Two – Offensive Lineman from the Yellowknife Wraiths.

Good pick here as New York gets the best Offensive Lineman in the league. This man will never retire, he will live forever. For the second time, Laszlo gets picked in Expansion. Maybe this time, it will actually work out.

Round 11 – Pick 21
The New York Silverbacks select:

Macaroni Elephant – Offensive Lineman from the Philadelphia Liberty

Decent pick as Macaroni Elephant is developing extremely nicely in the Developmental Simualtion Football League.

Round 11 – Pick 22
The Berlin Fire Salamanders select:

Simon Tremblay – Offensive Lineman from the Philadelphia Liberty

A protected player? How can this be? Wait….we have word coming in
The Berlin Fire Salamanders have traded their first round pick in the upcoming draft for the rights to Simon Tremblay. What a ridiculous trade as Tremblay is a mediocre player.

That’s the end of the Expansion Draft, let’s look at the Results:

New York Silverbacks:
- Bruce Buckley [1]
- Hal Fassingit [4]
- Byron Dolls [5]
- Icebox Riposte [8]
- Dick Thruster [9]
- Givussarefarre Rubbe [12]
- Dorfus Jimbo Jr. [13]
- Joey McCabe [16]
- Samuel Bakhtiari [17]
- Laszlo Forty-Two [20]
- Macaroni Elephant [21]


Berlin Fire Salamanders:
- Julio Jones [2]
- Edmond Beaver-Dantes [3]
- Dick Thunder [6]
- Perry Tucker Jr. [7]
- I Hop [10]
- Ajay Krishna [11]
- Jorcher Minor [14]
- Douglas Quail [15]
- OL Bot [18]
- OL Bot [19]
- Simon Tremblay [22 – Spent a first round pick to acquire]


Thanks for reading this 100% true expansion mock.

Please note that anything in this article is satirical and there is no harm intended. Any names used are fictional and any correspondence to actual ISFL player is purely incidental. Except for Frost. Frost sux lmap.

[DarknessRising]

Hmmm, someone might want to report this to HO. We can't have someone leaking all the picks like this without getting fined, we cannot stand for this injustice! #NoLeeks

[gucci]

Ajay Krishna is auto-protected bro this is tampering!

[37thchamber]

Hmmm, someone might want to report this to HO. We can't have someone leaking all the picks like this without getting fined, we cannot stand for this injustice! #NoLeeks

The future is now, old man

[C9Van]

Round 10 – Pick 20
The New York Silverbacks select:

Laszlo Forty-Two – Offensive Lineman from the Yellowknife Wraiths.

Good pick here as New York gets the best Offensive Lineman in the league. This man will never retire, he will live forever. For the second time, Laszlo gets picked in Expansion. Maybe this time, it will actually work out.

I appreciate the compliment dude, hopefully a fair rub Hall of Fame knocking. 

But alas, due to this very specific media of me getting picked in another expansion, the retiring Lazzy will now double retire.

[Dewalt27]

@Highhaschdi dude what the hell!?! Why do you keep leaking our info