(S20) - PT3 - Celebrations

[Baron1898]

Is it even really possible to win the Ultimus? Is that legal?

Well I guess someone has to win in the playoffs each year, even though it’s never been me. I suppose they go to Disney World, big celebrations, zip a dee fucking doo dah. My good friend Franklin Armstrong says it’s no big deal, which of course he said while on his fifteenth consecutive pleasure cruise. I imagine it’s pretty fun nonetheless. You get to go to Disney, be adored in your hometown, drink lots of alcohol in the mandatory parade, the whole shebang. The team hangs up one of those festive banners in the stadium, further immortalizing your achievement for the rest of all time. The offseason starts off with a bang instead of a whimper - you go into the new year with an energy and a zeal that only comes from the knowledge that you spent Ultimus night on the field with confetti raining all around you instead of sitting on your couch, sobbing into your pillow and stuffing your face with cheap snacks. Of course, I’m a lot more familiar with the latter experience. But I’m sure it’s something special to hoist that trophy high and go to Disney World.