19) Chunt The Badger has been a ferocious yet majestic beast taking the league by storm since his debut within January. He has coveted the hearts of many and is adored by all. His stripes and soft, silky smooth fur only add to the beautiful personality he covets. However, he is not known for just being the sexiest creature in league, but also being the league’s ambassador for anal lube. Chunt, being the only creature in the league to be living with two buttholes, is the best fit for this type of deal. Yet, he seems to be underfire for some previously made statements about none other than the user iStegosauruz, more commonly known as Steg. Steg has filed harassment charges against Chunt, along with a restraining order. This news has yet to break the league so consider this the first report. Steg’s stance on Chunt is not highly favored however, with other users questioning why and how a Badger could be so malicious as Steg has claimed. This news only has worsened considering the recent pregnancy of Steg by his long time friend Gucci, only complicating the matter. In the words of Steg, “I don’t want that Badger getting their greasy paws on my love child.” Chunt has yet to release a public statement and is rumored to be heartbroken. DM me for more info.
21) Throughout watching this season of the International Simulation Football League’s games, the best branding has to go to the New York Silverbacks. Their design is a cool 1920’s inspired logo that features their coveted Silverback that I will be referring to as a gorilla for the rest of this question. The gorilla ties in perfectly to the iconic King Kong scene where Kong climbs up the Empire State building. Their colors are vibrant and pair beautifully together on the field creating a great experience for viewers at home, not having to deal with eye strain when it comes to the contrast of the players, or dotts, during the game. This design and branding has me screaming about the beauty that is the Great Gatsby and has me roaring to want to see another game of theirs.
The team that could use a refresh when it comes to their branding is within the DSFL, and that team is unfortunately the Bondi Beach Buccaneers. Really, I love their branding but the colors of their field are almost nauseating. I get eye strain having to look at it and am reaching for my blue light blocking glasses throughout the games. Maybe I’m just a hater but I am not a fan of yellow in general. Further, their name allows for too many easily made insults from teams that are worse than them to feel better about themselves. Converting back to Myrtle Beach might be the best thing for this team. However, if anyone is ever looking to drink rum, BBB don’t hesitate to call me.
22) Restraining orders have not been hyped up enough within the league as well as the general world. Nothing is better than a court slapping you in the face by stating you cannot see someone to do your constant stalking of them. It is with that being said, Chunt The Badger has filed a restraining order against iStegosauruz. This is a counter restraining order, in response to Steg’s own. Chunt, to go one step further as he always does, has become the new face of the ISFL Legal Defense Team’s Restraining Order Fast Tracker. Do you have someone in the league that has been causing you immense distress and has hurtled heavy insults? Has head office been too busy to fully solve your issue? File a restraining order! If you’re having any issues, contact Chunt The Badger to be set up with a consultation today with the finest of lawyers to represent and settle any dispute between users. No complaint is too silly to be addressed. The Legal Defense Team is prepared to take on any case, no matter how daunting it is, in the name of justice and for Chunt to be payed extra because he is a poor poor badger that needs the money.
29) If any of you have taken the time to so graciously glanced upon the upmost important media the adored Chunt The Badger has put out throughout the season, including his media released before he was drafted, you would have noticed his pleas to head office about awards. He claims that the league is speciest when it comes to its grammar and phrasing of awards, ultimately creating an unhealthy dynamic when it comes down to human versus nonhuman players. He has proposed the award of “Most Sexiest Badger,” incorrect grammar and all, in order to make up for his discounting of awards. However, the league can go so much farther than what Chunt has proposed. The league needs to adopt new language and awards that include the taxing of players that are not human and cannot compete with their bipedal and hulk like counterparts. Nonhuman players deserve a whole award show within their own right, dedicated to recognizing their ambitious talents and where no animal ranks higher than the other. The awards show shall be called the “International Simulation Football League’s Annual Recognition Award Show and How We Can Be Better Allies” to offer repayment and appreciation for the sacrifices these tiny animals such as Chunt The Badger and Busch Goose go through, being pummeled by beings that are four times the size of them.
21) Throughout watching this season of the International Simulation Football League’s games, the best branding has to go to the New York Silverbacks. Their design is a cool 1920’s inspired logo that features their coveted Silverback that I will be referring to as a gorilla for the rest of this question. The gorilla ties in perfectly to the iconic King Kong scene where Kong climbs up the Empire State building. Their colors are vibrant and pair beautifully together on the field creating a great experience for viewers at home, not having to deal with eye strain when it comes to the contrast of the players, or dotts, during the game. This design and branding has me screaming about the beauty that is the Great Gatsby and has me roaring to want to see another game of theirs.
The team that could use a refresh when it comes to their branding is within the DSFL, and that team is unfortunately the Bondi Beach Buccaneers. Really, I love their branding but the colors of their field are almost nauseating. I get eye strain having to look at it and am reaching for my blue light blocking glasses throughout the games. Maybe I’m just a hater but I am not a fan of yellow in general. Further, their name allows for too many easily made insults from teams that are worse than them to feel better about themselves. Converting back to Myrtle Beach might be the best thing for this team. However, if anyone is ever looking to drink rum, BBB don’t hesitate to call me.
22) Restraining orders have not been hyped up enough within the league as well as the general world. Nothing is better than a court slapping you in the face by stating you cannot see someone to do your constant stalking of them. It is with that being said, Chunt The Badger has filed a restraining order against iStegosauruz. This is a counter restraining order, in response to Steg’s own. Chunt, to go one step further as he always does, has become the new face of the ISFL Legal Defense Team’s Restraining Order Fast Tracker. Do you have someone in the league that has been causing you immense distress and has hurtled heavy insults? Has head office been too busy to fully solve your issue? File a restraining order! If you’re having any issues, contact Chunt The Badger to be set up with a consultation today with the finest of lawyers to represent and settle any dispute between users. No complaint is too silly to be addressed. The Legal Defense Team is prepared to take on any case, no matter how daunting it is, in the name of justice and for Chunt to be payed extra because he is a poor poor badger that needs the money.
29) If any of you have taken the time to so graciously glanced upon the upmost important media the adored Chunt The Badger has put out throughout the season, including his media released before he was drafted, you would have noticed his pleas to head office about awards. He claims that the league is speciest when it comes to its grammar and phrasing of awards, ultimately creating an unhealthy dynamic when it comes down to human versus nonhuman players. He has proposed the award of “Most Sexiest Badger,” incorrect grammar and all, in order to make up for his discounting of awards. However, the league can go so much farther than what Chunt has proposed. The league needs to adopt new language and awards that include the taxing of players that are not human and cannot compete with their bipedal and hulk like counterparts. Nonhuman players deserve a whole award show within their own right, dedicated to recognizing their ambitious talents and where no animal ranks higher than the other. The awards show shall be called the “International Simulation Football League’s Annual Recognition Award Show and How We Can Be Better Allies” to offer repayment and appreciation for the sacrifices these tiny animals such as Chunt The Badger and Busch Goose go through, being pummeled by beings that are four times the size of them.
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