15. In my expert opinion, I would have to say that Yellowknife Wraith’s linebacker Douglas Quaid is the MVP of the Ultimus championship game. None of the offensive players for the Wraiths really stepped up and had too big of a game, it was more just good teamwork and all around play on the offensive side of the ball for them. On the defensive side of the game though, Douglas Quaid was amazingly dominant. He had twice as many tackles as the next highest on his team with 10. It wasn’t just the big tackle numbers that led me to this conclusion though. He defended two passes, which is always impressive for a linebacker - especially one that’s always making plays in the backfield. Speaking of plays in the backfield, he also managed to get a sack, which is always a huge play. A sack can be a game changer, and it can also demoralize your opponent. However, we still aren’t done with his stats. He also forced one fumble, and recovered one fumble. Without this turnover, I think that the Austin Copperheads probably could have pulled this one off. Douglas Quaid played the biggest part in the win for the Wraiths, and that’s why he’s my Ultimus MVP. 207
17. As most of you people know, my player is Sam Sidekick. I’m a kicker and punter for the Chicago Butchers. You’ll know why I’m mentioning this in just a bit. I think that if the Chicago Butchers were going to ask me for some suggestions on changes or additions to a new stadium, one thing immediately comes to mind. Sure, asking for a smoothie bar, or a taco bell, or things like that would be nice, but that’s not where my head is currently at. What I have in mind is going to impact the way I play. I want the Butchers to put the entire stadium on a giant pedestal. Like a literal pedestal. According to Google, Chicago sits at just under 600 feet above sea level. Mexico City is liveable and that city is at 7382 feet above sea level. So I say that this pedestal should be AT LEAST 5000 feet tall, to put us at 5600 feet above sea level. This makes it easier to kick for distance. Many of my seasons have been disappointing, but with this one change to the stadium, I think that I could be the best kicker and punter in the league year in and year out, even through regression! 209
21. There are so many great prospects to choose from in both the ISFL and the DSFL, so I may choose two prospects, depending on the word count. The first prospect that I’d like to discuss is Rejoignez LOrdreSombre. Of course, everyone knows that this translates roughly to Join Dark Order, which has been a typical saying in the Butchers server for a while. LOrdreSombre was playing for the Kansas City Coyotes this season, splitting carries in the backfield with Fitted Cuddles. Even though LOrdreSombre had 51 fewer carries than Cuddles, he finished the year only 143 less yards than Cuddles. This shows that he is an efficient running back, which is evident by his 4.8 yards per carry. Not bad for a rookie! He also managed to find his way into the endzone 8 times on the ground this season. As for receiving, he wasn’t the best receiving back, but he was at least serviceable, with 20 catches for 186 yards and 1 receiving touchdown. Unfortunately for all of the ISFL teams that are reading my scouting report, this one is quite useless, because Rejoignez LOrdreSombre is the GM of the Chicago Butchers, so he will undoubtedly be taken with Chicago’s second round pick, as is required by the rules. 211
26. If my current position, which is kicker and punter, wasn’t available when I made my player I would have been heart broken. I don’t know a lot about football, and I wanted to make a player at a position that is sort of similar to a goaltender in hockey. I was told that would be the kicker position. I think that if kicker or punter didn’t exist, people may have told me that quarterback is the most similar to goaltender maybe? Just because there’s only one of them. But the quarterback’s role is much different than a goaltender, so I’m not really sure. I wouldn’t have wanted to be a quarterback anyway, because that’s a lot of pressure, and I don’t typically make enough money to buy equipment. In a way the players on the offensive line are kind of like the goaltender. The goaltender in hockey is supposed to protect the net, and keep the other team from scoring. The offensive line players are supposed to protect the quarterback, and keep them from getting to the quarterback. I think that I probably would have chosen to create a player on the offensive line rather than quarterback, because there’s much less pressure on the offensive line. 206
17. As most of you people know, my player is Sam Sidekick. I’m a kicker and punter for the Chicago Butchers. You’ll know why I’m mentioning this in just a bit. I think that if the Chicago Butchers were going to ask me for some suggestions on changes or additions to a new stadium, one thing immediately comes to mind. Sure, asking for a smoothie bar, or a taco bell, or things like that would be nice, but that’s not where my head is currently at. What I have in mind is going to impact the way I play. I want the Butchers to put the entire stadium on a giant pedestal. Like a literal pedestal. According to Google, Chicago sits at just under 600 feet above sea level. Mexico City is liveable and that city is at 7382 feet above sea level. So I say that this pedestal should be AT LEAST 5000 feet tall, to put us at 5600 feet above sea level. This makes it easier to kick for distance. Many of my seasons have been disappointing, but with this one change to the stadium, I think that I could be the best kicker and punter in the league year in and year out, even through regression! 209
21. There are so many great prospects to choose from in both the ISFL and the DSFL, so I may choose two prospects, depending on the word count. The first prospect that I’d like to discuss is Rejoignez LOrdreSombre. Of course, everyone knows that this translates roughly to Join Dark Order, which has been a typical saying in the Butchers server for a while. LOrdreSombre was playing for the Kansas City Coyotes this season, splitting carries in the backfield with Fitted Cuddles. Even though LOrdreSombre had 51 fewer carries than Cuddles, he finished the year only 143 less yards than Cuddles. This shows that he is an efficient running back, which is evident by his 4.8 yards per carry. Not bad for a rookie! He also managed to find his way into the endzone 8 times on the ground this season. As for receiving, he wasn’t the best receiving back, but he was at least serviceable, with 20 catches for 186 yards and 1 receiving touchdown. Unfortunately for all of the ISFL teams that are reading my scouting report, this one is quite useless, because Rejoignez LOrdreSombre is the GM of the Chicago Butchers, so he will undoubtedly be taken with Chicago’s second round pick, as is required by the rules. 211
26. If my current position, which is kicker and punter, wasn’t available when I made my player I would have been heart broken. I don’t know a lot about football, and I wanted to make a player at a position that is sort of similar to a goaltender in hockey. I was told that would be the kicker position. I think that if kicker or punter didn’t exist, people may have told me that quarterback is the most similar to goaltender maybe? Just because there’s only one of them. But the quarterback’s role is much different than a goaltender, so I’m not really sure. I wouldn’t have wanted to be a quarterback anyway, because that’s a lot of pressure, and I don’t typically make enough money to buy equipment. In a way the players on the offensive line are kind of like the goaltender. The goaltender in hockey is supposed to protect the net, and keep the other team from scoring. The offensive line players are supposed to protect the quarterback, and keep them from getting to the quarterback. I think that I probably would have chosen to create a player on the offensive line rather than quarterback, because there’s much less pressure on the offensive line. 206
![[Image: evok.png]](https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/676490307650453559/1113110524406808596/evok.png)
