(S29) PT 4 - Statues

[Dagumpa]

As I've said on numerous occasions, I am not an ISFL historian. I'm probably the opposite if anything. In fact, I'd argue I have negative amounts of knowledge of the ISFL. Which means when I tell you everything I know about the ISFL, you become dumber as a result. Although that's generally what happens to everyone who talks to me. I'll start to complain about how pogs aren't in style anymore. Then I'll try to flag down random people walking by to ask them about their favorite soda branding. Meanwhile, you'll be constantly refreshing the Uber app in hopes that you won't be in hell for much longer. But anyway, I only know one Austin Copperhead pretty well: Dex Kennedy. I've talked at length about how crazy his previous season was. I mean, 4 defensive touchdowns. Hubba hubba. So yeah, I'd give myself a statue. And I'd list all four of the awards I won that season alone. Which is also all the awards I've ever won in this league. And I'd mention that I got less votes for the Pro Bowl than the other two LBs named to it that season. Just...don't include my all-time win/loss record. I got about the same amount of cred there as Cal Ripken. But I am pretty sexy. So there's that.

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