(S30) PT 2 - Alternate History

[shrub02]

There are many choices to be made in life and as a robot I have superior free will than that of simple human free will. You see I'm actually programmed to bend girders. But I said screw that, I'm going to bend human on the football field instead. Ot truly takes superior mental capabilities to override your programming and make your own decisions l. All that to say that I am better than you meat bags. Bite my glorious golden ass if you have a problem with that. Now that's out of the way I can tell you why I started playing football. I was perusing the electronics department of a store, looking for a nice TV to steal. One of the TVs had a football game on and I saw a weak little human smash another one. Bent him right in half. The announcer went on and on about how great this player was and how much he was getting paid. I figured I could bend all 11 humans straight in one go. And now look at me. I'm the greatest linebacker to ever grace the field. If I didn't decide to play football, I'd probably still be at the factory bending things. Not because I would have to. But because I would choose to. I just enjoy bending things. Or maybe I'd work for a delivery service I don't know.

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