(S9) - Weekend PT 5 - Bad Investments

[pazuzu]

My life has been nothing but the greatest ideas and investments one right after another. Kif can attest to that as well, can’t you my dear boy! .... See that is why I keep you around, and to do my laundry. Back on the subject. There is one moment in my mind that I can say that was definitively a bad investment. I remember it like it was yesterday… I awoke from my slumber as usual, went to took care of my daily “briefing” if you catch my drift. Afterwards, I joined my men in the bridge to debrief. During this there came a knock upon the window of the Nimbus; and out there floating were intergalactic girl scouts selling their delectable cookies. I was distracted by the girl scouts and those mouthwatering cookies, Kif took over the rest of the meeting for me, while I went to purchase some. I bought the whole lot of their cookies almost 200 boxes. Now, at the time, I thought this was the best purchase in the history of purchases but no one wanted any cookies. So, I had to take it upon myself to every damn single cookie Kif made me buy. Which I did, in the same day. Never in my life have I felt sicker, to this day I swear those Girl Scouts poisoned me and I will exact my revenge.

[infinitempg]

Being the first person of Indonesian nationality to become a professional football player, I have attracted a lot of attention from entrepreneurs and business people from Indonesia. One time, a friend said his coworker’s cousin’s pet elephant’s previous owner was from northern Jakarta and had a philanthropic idea for the local community - a nice park area in a city that oh god so desperately needs it. So I chipped in a few thousand dollars to help this dude out since it was a cause I believed in. I wouldn’t say that I got ripped off - the man was genuinely attempting to help the community and actually did build this park - but within a year the the combination of sea level rise, the sinking of the city, and a couple strong rain storms totally destroyed the park. It was beyond repair, and unfortunately would be too expensive to rebuild. I guess you could call this a rip off (since no one really gained from it and it was a complete loss) but at least we tried.