Rolf Larsendorf

[HazardouSpork]

Hey there, I'm Rolf. I know not many of you have heard of me, but yesterday a reporter wrote a short article on me, and... ya know, I didn't like it much. And now, because my agent yelled at me when I said "no I am not ready for them" I am here. So hey there now. I'm Rolf and uh, I don't like talking about myself but um, I'm told I'm going to answer your questions. Does anybody have a dip? Hmm.

Oh you're waiting on me? Do I need to signal? Oh I can just say I'm ready? I am. I'm ready.

Um, to Mr. Law's questions.
1 - Um I feel like my playing style is go and do what the coaches tell me, ya know? So my playing style right now is Bob.
2 - The teams with the brighter colors are more seeable than the rest, if that's what you mean.

Ballerstorm I think your names funny, ya know? Oh I'm a ball in a storm! Ahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!
1 - What? Wait. What?
1a - Oh for sure. I played tight end before at college school and I was really good.
2 - I thought the stadium music was great. Never heard a polka group play so much Rammstein before.
3 - It definitely had more Americans than all the other bowls, so I was a little intimidated by all guns, but then on the pitch I was just a tight end doin my thing, ya know? I was up, I was down, it's up to you guys and the coaches to tell me how I did cuz I was honestly nervous.
4 - Someone showed me videos of Mark Chumura. He put on all the moves.
5 - I'm most familiar with whatever we played today, but honestly, I like the kind of offense where I have to keep my helmet on at all times.

I can answer any other questions.

Oh hi there Mr. Phil.
1 - I'm flattered. Um I like the quarterback, cuz I've thrown racquetball at small-necked geese with middin' success. Nothin like the big ones but that's just not fair eh. Other than that, I don't know. Is there a defensive tight end? I guess if I had to I would.
2 - I grew up in a strict Milwaukee Wave family so I wasn't allowed to watch anything but indoor soccer.
3 - I was told ahead of time that's a trick question. Tight end, ok?
4 - It's like Shakespeare said, "It's all a simulation Neo." So I guess with that said all the money.
5 - I'm gonna buy my mom a pet frog. My dad a sweater with fewer holes. My cousin a DVD of all the SNL Pat Paulsen skits, but he's dead so I'll probably burn it as fuel for heating my gloves.

[Law]

How would you explain your play style?
Any teams stand out for you?

[Admin]

Wait, what? Are you ready?

What did you think if the all american bowl?

How was the competition in the all american bowl compared to college?

Who do you try to emulate when it comes to your style of play?

What type of offense fits you best?

[BenderRodriguez]

Hey there Rolf, this is Phillip Fry from Express Sports. A few questions if you don't mind.


1) Expert analysts have you projected at multiple positions. Which position on the football field best suits your talents and why?


2) What NSFL team did you root for when you were a kid?


3) If you weren't playing football, what kind of career would you pursue?


4) What aspect of being a professional simulation athlete are you looking forward to most?


5) Once you receive your signing bonus, what are you going to do with that first check?

[HazardouSpork]

Hey there now. I just wanted to tell all of you that I'm answering questions up top. My sister showed me how, so I'm good.

[timeconsumer]

1) Rolf, you seem to be one of the few tight ends in this draft class with any experience as a blocker, do you feel this might pigeonhole you into too narrow a role?
2) Do you think your strength or your speed is your biggest asset?
3) How did you get number 7 as a tight end? Aren't they normally restricted to 41-49 & 81-89?
4) Who has the better looking wife, Eric Decker or Jay Cutler?
5) Which player in the All American game do you think is this year's sleeper?

[HazardouSpork]

Hey there timeconsumer, thanks for the questions.
1 - Oh no!! I'm going to get pigeonholed into making tons of money on teams that need me? NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
1 follow up - I apologize for the sarcasm above, ya know? I haven't had press around much before. Of course I'm scared of getting pigeonholed. That's why I've petitioned to have a face shield. Can never be too careful with pigeons.
2 - This is my body, there are many like it, but is one is mind. That said, I don't know.
3 - Sometimes you gotta just show up to the numbers office and say "Hi. I'm definitely a not a tight end. Oh no I lost my a couple quarters on the ground. Guess they're gone forever, it's too bad there's no one here to take them."
4 - I discovered Laguna Beach as a teenager. So you know, ya know?
5 - I Dias told this was a trick question. I definitely do not sleep in games.