(S26) - PT 4 - It could be a bowling alley!

[Tylar]

SHL Affiliate

[charlit]

Killian Chambers was resting at home the week following Philadelphia’s huge win against Sarasota. He was lying on the couch watching season 5 of the show The Expanse, which came out in the ancient year of 2020. Just when things were starting to get interesting, a knock at his door interrupted him. Who could possibly be at my door at this hour? Chambers thought. He opened the door, but no one was there. All he could see was a brown box sitting at his doorstep. The box was covered in duct tape and looked hastily packaged. Chambers examined the box and saw that “Merry Christmas, enjoy this special gift” was written on the box in sharpie. Before opening the box, Chambers also noticed the return address was in the city of Sarasota. That’s weird, thought Chambers, maybe someone wanted to do a jersey swap and forgot to ask? They should’ve just dm’d me on twitter…

Chambers opened the box and was hit by a horrible smell. He had to hold his nose as he stared at the contents inside the box. Inside of the box was a pile of fake, novelty poop. As fake as it looked, it sure smelled like the real thing. Chambers has no idea who sent him this “gift”, it could be from anyone.

[Jepox]

https://simulationhockey.com/showthread....pid2959860 SHL PT

[Booger]

Fawn Dillmiballs returns home on a dreary winter afternoon after finishing up with practice for the day to find a reasonably sized package on his front doorstep. From the outside, it looks normal, just your standard cardboard box. He thinks it might be one of the Manscaped: Lawnmower 6.9s #ad he ordered for himself or potentially a gift from his parents or one of his many siblings (he does need some new socks), but doesn't think much of it as he brings it inside. The next morning, Fawn makes his way to the kitchen to make himself something nice on his offday and sees the package once more. "Might as well open it" he thinks. So, he uses one of his Manscaped: Lawnmower 6.9s #ad to cut the tape and opens the box to find yet another cardboard box. He repeats the process, finding another cardboard box. This happens again, and again, and again, until his floor is littered with cardboard boxes of varying sizes. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Fawn comes across a small, fancy looking cardboard box with the letter F inscribed on the lid. Fawn lifts it open cautiously, simultaneously excited and petrified as to what might be inside. Through squinted eyes, Fawn could only make out a small slip of paper. On it were seven words that sent a chill down his spine. 

Make sure to get your update in.

[zeagle1]

Chuck got a package? Chuck got a package! Never being a very patient person, Chuck immediately rips open the box to find some... beef jerky! Beef Jerky is Chuck's favorite food, who could know Chuck so well? He reads the note and sees that it's a gift from Zayn, the most offensive man on twitter. Naturally, as Zayn used to be a bird dog, he hunted it and processed it himself. 
This gift is extremely thoughtful and Chuck appreciates it for all of a few seconds before immediately devouring it! Chuck needs lean protein in order to get bigger, faster, and stronger. While this beef jerky might not give Chuck any TPE, it sure tastes like it does! Even though Chuck is already at the strength and speed caps for his position, the beef jerky made Chuck feel like he just invest another couple hundred TPE into those attributes! This was actually a cunning plan by Zayn and the entire Silverbacks organization, as Chuck ate all the beef jerky and actually got fatter, lowering his speed and strength by a couple hundred TPE. 
Regardless of attributes, Chuck is very thankful for the gift and writes Zayn a nice thank you card, which he proceeds to forget to mail to Zayn and instead tells him how grateful he is after the next Arizona vs New York Game.

[slothfacekilla]

SHL PT

[xTri]

PBE CW

[TheSparkyDee]

Merry Christmas! It’s the *INSERT HOW MANY SEASONS* Minnesota Grey Ducks Christmas party! We had old players and new players and even the GMs joined in on the fun! Each active player got another active player on the roster for secret Santa gifts. $300 dollar limit of course cause we are not like CC and rolling in cash! Each present was wrapped individually by the team staff and the wrapping paper was Minnesota Grey Ducks paper! It was awesome, so after each gift was passed out we went down the line of players and coaches. There were some wild gifts being dished out. And when it finally got to me... Mike Hunt I was super excited and opened it and it was a.... ROCK! I said oh this is cool! Is it some kind of Special Rock? Someone says “NO”, it’s a moon rock from THE MOON! I looked down the table and it was our very own GM @TheCC. I was shocked he got me such a awesome gift, it cost him a whopping $299 for this rock from the moon! Now actually starting to think it was not a real moon rock… Would a moon rock cost $299? Or more like thousands and thousands of dollars. What if the “gift” CC got me was just a rock he got off the side of the highway? Or he legit thought he got a moon rock. Oh well Merry Christmas from the Quackers! 


246 Words

[AW13]

It was a brisk,winter morning when Joliet Christ Jr. went to his Dallas apartment's front door after a swift knock. There was no one at the door but upon looking down, a box can be seen. Not a big box, one that would likely fit in the regular mail box but it was delivered to the door, by UPS or FedEx, the van was unmarked!

Upon opening the box, Christ Jr. chuckles as he sees exactly what is in the package marked especially for him. What was in the box? Let's detail it!

Inside the package:
1 Copy of new eye insurance coverage for the Dallas Birddogs and some insurance cards marked especially for the young QB.
1 pair of reading glasses with a sticky note on them that reads, "For the playbook and the tablet to watch the previous plays. Or just for READING a defense."
1 box of lens wipes for glasses
1 pair of color blind fixing glasses with a sticky note that reads, "in case that the reason you throw to the other team is that you can't tell the jerseys apart!"

And also a card that reads, "NO MORE PICKS! With love, @Kyamprac "

The Dallas GM likes to have a lot of fun with Christ who is on a bad stretch I'm protecting the ball!

[excelsior]

Right after Maui's game for week 7, he went back to his apartment building and checked his PO box, which had a package, with no revealing marks or decor. Maui took it back to his apartment, and left it there, for about a day before he remembered he actually had it. After coming back from training, his interest had piqued and he decided to open the mysterious cardboard prism. On the inside was a New York Silverbacks shirt along with a pair of tickets to the Silverbacks vs Hahalua game next week. Maui was excited, for sure, but he was confused on why he recieved it. He thought it was just an act of kindness from a Dallas fan or player or alumni that was on the Silverbacks. He decided to wear the Silverbacks shirt to practice the next day, and it actually generated a lot of interest. The media even showed up to interview Maui on why he was sporting an ISFL team's merchandise. After asking some of his teammates, Maui figured out that the Silverbacks team themselves must have sent the tickets, since it was unobtainable for the public, those specific tickets. Maui then recalled a great conversation he had with a Silverback scout, and put 2 and 2 together.