(S26) - PT 3 - Oh, the Who-manity!

[Memento Mori]

While the average football player aims to make a small difference to the lives of unfortunate people, Brandon Booker has eyes set on something bigger. As a member of the Orange County Otters and a man with proud British heritage, Brandon Booker recognises a chance to help everyone in California – and maybe even the entire United States – by showing them how to make hot drinks that don’t make you grimace.

The United States is world-famous for its gritty, poor-tasting coffee. Brandon Booker would show the people of southern California how to actually make coffee. The first problem is the method used. Why does the USA insist on making filter coffee using poor quality beans? But this is far from the biggest problem. Coffee should be made with water that is hot, but not boiling. Americans have an unjustified obsession with making coffee at close to 200 degrees Celsius so that it stays hot longer. This point is exacerbated by the practice of keeping the coffee at a ridiculously high temperature after it has been made. What is the point in making coffee that stays hot longer if no one in their right mind wants to drink it? Filter coffee kept at a high temperature quickly goes burnt and stale, meaning that drinking it is a frankly awful experience. Brandon Booker would first watch a California native attempt to make coffee, and then demonstrate how to make coffee that doesn’t taste horrible. I’m sure there are plenty of people in California who are able to make acceptable coffee, but this demonstration would be lifechanging for the great many who don’t.

Of course, coffee is not the only hot beverage. Brandon Booker would also educate the people of California on tea, and, more crucially, tea made well. By the way, any aversion that residents of the United States have towards tea deriving from anti-imperialist/anti-British sentiments or from the events of the Boston Tea Party are frankly ridiculous – tea originates from China. Making tea well is similarly simple, and yet Americans often fail in this regard too. All teas, whether English Breakfast, Earl Grey, Chai… should be left to brew for at least a few minutes before drinking, and before milk or sugar is added. You’d think this was simple, but the evidence (sadly) suggests otherwise. On the bright side, this means that Brandon Booker will be able to have a significant positive impact on the lives of Californians.