(S15) PT 2 - Absolute Power

[Air Crou]

"Imagine what you would do if you were GM for a day" you say. Sounds like that Jim Carrey movie, Bruce Almighty. But there is no girls or gods involved here. But really? What would I do if I were the Norfolk GM for a day? What about the Yellowknife GM spot? What about both at the same day? Honestly, I have no idea. I can think of something on the spot though. Cmon mate, you gotta think of something. AH I got it!

Obviously call me up if it's the YKW I am filling in for. If it's the NOR, then change the strats and incorporate more passing on offence and more blitzing to stop the runs in DSFL.

I would 100% keep the teams in the cities they are though. I would even renew the leases for the stadiums. Or even use team funds to build new stadia, better than the old ones and privately owned. Use them in the offseason to hold concerts and get more cash in.

But you will say, "How can you do all these in a day?" Well, I can start all these things. The GMs will surely like them and finalise them when they are back at their posts. Unless I am a lunatic. My psychiatrist thinks I am fine though. Unless he is a lunatic too. Dunno...

[ADwyer87]

So, if I had ultimate power, what would I do? SIKE, im the commissioner, I already have ultimate power. But, if I wanted to abuse my power to control the Orange County Otters? I would do a few things.

First off, I would trade Showbiz, Crush, and Anoa'i to some team for an actually good QB. I cant have any WRs stealing my touches, and Showbiz keeps throwing it more to the other team than he is throwing it to me. I may be having a breakout year, but I need MOAR! I'm not even #1 on my team in targets. Come on, give me the ball! I also need more TDs, I only have 3, and we have the second least passing TDs this season.

Next, I would cut Broxton. Not trade, just cut. He sucks. Who cares that he's tied for 3rd with 14 PDs and is tied for 2nd with 3 INTs? Only 31 tackles in 8 games? That sucks! Hes over the hill, clearly cant get it done anymore, time to cut our losses with him.

Lastly, I'd trade Grithead so Sunnycursed can do punt returns and kick returns. We could get some new, younger DBs who can get the job done, but not well enough that they take my special teams reps

[dizzyDC]

Well... I'm already one of the co-gm's for the Palm Beach Solar Bears so I guess I will write this about the Austin Copperheads... sorry Adam and Joe. The first thing that I would do would be to create a new set of bylaws that give me control over the team for a longer period of time than what the pt description specified. If I am going to have control over the team, I am going to have it for the long haul and there will be no stopping my reign of terror. The second thing that I would do would be to keep Adam and Joe on in an advisory role. Every king needs advisors so they can make all of the tough decisions while I just sit there and look pretty. The third thing that I would do would be to change the mascot from the copperheads to the cottonheaded ninnymuggins as featured in the holiday classic Elf. I mean, honestly, who doesn't love that movie? The mascot will be Will Ferrell hopped up on cocaine in an elf costume. Simply perfection from my viewpoint. The last thing that I would do would be to instruct my scouts that I only want linebackers on the team and we can convert them into everything else. Like Tom Cable thinking anyone can be a offensive lineman, we can make linebackers anything. We have the technology and power to do so.

[Duress]

It's time for Guy Nikko to turn the Palm Beach Solar Bears franchise upside-down. First, he's going to bring in a film crew and create a reality TV show with himself as the star. I know, linebacker isn't really a star position, but Guy doesn't care, he's in control. The film crew will document the preparation that Guy does before the game, the mood in the locker room, the interactions with all of his teammates. Then there will just be Guy Nikko highlights for the rest of the episode. Guy is expecting that this show will have about 10 seasons.

Then, he is going to rebrand the team. Nothing against the Solar Bears, but it's already been done. The new team name will be the Palm Beach Penetration. Guy will leave the logo design up to the public, because that's always a good idea. Then he will pretend to be shocked when an extremely suggestive logo wins the online poll, but he will stay firm and declare that he won't go back on his word. But really, this is what he wanted all along. Guy Nikko has created the ultimate meme team and will rule over the NSFL memes with an iron fist.

[Beaver]

ur mom lol

[Leafer]

http://probaseballexperience.jcink.net/ind...=60&#entry80132

[WALDO]

http://probaseballexperience.jcink.net/ind...indpost&p=80165

[Raven]

Written Option: Your GM just called in sick today and left you in charge to do whatever you want. What would you do with your day if you had absolute control of your team for a day? Relocate? Make trades? Rework your own contract? Change strats? Write about what you would do with that power. If you already are a GM, write about what you wish you could do if fate/HO/other GMs allowed? Or maybe who you would want to run your team in your absence and how they would do?
Make sure to keep this civil and avoid potential tampering.

It's real easy like. When the Hawks gm is out of town I come swooping in and take over the team. First order of buisness is to rebrand the team. Hawks are out dated, but you know what is hip and happening? Fuckin Giraffes.

The Baltimore Giraffes

Now that is a slick name. With that buisness taken care of it's time to look at the players. Gambino needs to focus on his music career. It's time to bring in some fresh blood and that fresh blood is the worst quarterback in the dsfl tm. That being Corvo Havran ofcourse. With the best of the worst coming into the important position of quarterbacking the team it's time to win games and get cups.

Then it's time to look into bringing in some studs. Let's start with the eurobae himself, Tomen, coming in. Then it is time to get my partner in depression into the team, that ofcourse being ADywer and then to finish it off I will bring in Jiggly to be my back up quarterback ofcourse.

That way we're in the same place so it's way easier to record the backup podcast.

Then my gm will come back into the office and absolutely whoop my ass for fuckin with the team.

[contacts]

If, under a mysterious circumstance, rookie GM Jammerson Irving were given the powers of GM, team president, or owner for a day the Arizona Outlaws would certainly be in huge trouble as an organization, both competitively and financially. Why? Where to start.....

First of all, Jammerson would immediately move his team to his native Jamaica - building what would most assuredly be a poorly planned and slap dash stadium - The Bob Marley Memorial Stadium and Concert Hall of Jamming. It would soon gain infamy among the more conservative members of the NSFL for not only its tolerance to recreational marijuana, but its encouragement of it. Buy two beers get a spliff free promotions would become the rule rather than the exception, and the maze of smoke that settles on the lower bowl would become a home field advantage of sorts- the home team would learn to play with the reduced visibility as well and becoming inured to the effects of the second hand marijuana smoke.

While resigning Jammerson Irving to become the highest paid player in the league would be a priority, so would signing him as the player/head coach. The new offense, the Jam-Rock, would be instituted. A pound the ball, deep play action passing based offense would be known for its gimmicks big plays, but also its lack of cohesion and generally meandering, lazy play calling rife with penalties and confusion. However, Jammerson, while not on the field, would be seen wearing a ridiculous fur coat and a cigar sized blunt on the side-lines while acting as coach.

We could go on, but the most important takeaway is to never let Jammerson Irving be in charge of anything requiring the least bit of responsibility or forethought. It won't go well. Just put him on the field, let him run, and stop this craziness of asking him to do anything but that, thank you very much.

[Renrut]

PBE