(S26) - PT 1 - Keep the Change You Filthy Animal

[SlurmsMckenzie]

New season, new Slurms. But don't worry, the same old Slurm you know and love will still be stocked in local stores and Austin Stadium, but there will be a new Slurms McKenzie hitting the field this season. As you all know worms hit their growth spurts at different times than humans do so our party worm found himself growing a good six inches and packing on a few pounds to come in around 6'7" and 340 lbs. When asked about this miraculous growth spurt McKenzie had this to say, "Whimmy wham wham what do you expect? I drink all these bee- Slurm which gives me enough nutrients for a healthy diet! I also followed a strict regimen of partying! Partying plus Slurm equals - HEY DUDES!" That last portion of the quote was not directed at the interview, as Mr. McKenzie saw some people partying and immediately dashed with surprising speed to join them. We found out more after contacting Austin for information, turns out McKenzie has retrained from CB to OL. "He's a rookie and has already allowed a sack this season, but he's making good progress and has been laying a few people out in the first two games. Slurms is training hard and showing up to every practice ready to improve." The source of this quote wished to remain unnamed because I made them up for this article.

[Muford]

http://probaseballexperience.jcink.net/i...t&p=248569

welfare

[Forty Jordy]

PBE Affiliate

[speculadora]

Since last season, Owen Holloway has been diligently working on improving his hands. Despite his strong numbers by rookie wide receiver standards, he wound up dropping 13 passes. With the margin for error in the ISFL thinner than ever, dropped passes needed to be curbed for Holloway to emerge as a go-to wideout. In addition to that, he's been working on bulking up. After playing quarterback for about half of his DSFL career, he moved to wide receiver. That transition left him a little thinner than his coaches would have liked, and he carried his wiry frame into the pros the following season. The jump in the level of physicality from the DSFL to the ISFL was no joke, and Holloway found himself needing quite a bit of time to recover from the trials of his rookie season. With those adjustments being made, he hopes that he can make some real strides on his rookie season performance and put his name in the conversation with some of the league's best receivers. The Otters are certainly trusting him to do just that, as he was a featured part of their game plan in the pre-season. He will have to fend off stiff competition from Garfield Despacito Jr., however, who is poised for a breakout of his own after Future Trunks' incredible weight gain shifted him to the offensive line. Regardless of which one outperforms the other, the two should be a dynamic combination on the outside of the formation for second-year quarterback Suleiman Ramza.

[JKortesi81]

“They’re all just, children.”

That’s the first thing I thought when the Austin Copperheads opened training camp for the 26th season of the ISFL. As I enter my 12th season of professional football, I can’t help but to reflect. Gone are the long locks I was rocking when I won Ultimus MVP in Season 20. My usual cleanshaven face now has a nice beard, but that beard is littered with “salt and pepper” hairs. My brain is as sharp as ever, but my body isn’t quite bouncing back the way it used to. My endurance is lower. I have to work harder than ever to keep up my arm and my throwing accuracy. My agility is all but gone at this point. You won’t see me running past the OCO defense anymore, that’s for sure. My teammates are all kids that played on the playground thinking of being ME someday. We have a highly talented team that’s only going to get better and better. The problem is that I won’t be there to enjoy the payoff. I have a great offense around me. Watts is a terror at running back. Vequain is an amazing young addition to Videl-San and Jeeta. I just have to get them the ball as best as I can. But they’re not at their prime yet. And sadly, I’m way past it. This is probably it for me. My one last shot at glory. There’s a bunch of new, young, eager faces in Austin, and it’s up to this grizzled old man that’s losing his battle with Father Time to take them places this season. No pressure or anything. We got this. (276)

[DonnoMania]

SHL PT

[Troen]

The offseason is a time of change. Tell us what has changed for your player or for your team since you last took the field. Are you loaded up with new weapons or a large cast of rookies? Has your player improved, or are they currently in the throes of regression? How do you think this season will play out differently than ones before?

For myself, little has changed since last year. I've done what I can to step up into the of our dear departed captain Carolinabbq Isbest's shoes as this year's defensive captain, but I feel like I've pretty much peaked as far as individual playing ability. But, as this year's defensive captain, I think my role has expanded now to try and improve those around me on the team even more than normal - doing things like ensuring I'm always putting in max effort, seek out the newer players who are struggling and try to help them work through issues, that kind of thing. In a year that looks likely to be a very transitional one and likely Easton Cole's last before retiring, we might not have the highest hopes of winning an Ultimus. But, it's not like we have no hope or anything. Our defensive side of the ball is really coming into a strong unit, with what I think is possible the best front seven that we've had since I joined the team. We have a solid though perhaps less flashy pack of receivers who are damn fast. Sure, Cole might be a little interception-heavy, but maybe the wily vet can make his smarts work for another year? I think this best case is that he ends up as this season's old man Manning, where he gets dragged to a championship on the back of a great defense. Between his experience, the defense, and a few lucky breaks, I think we have a chance to compete. I can't say that we're the favorites, but I can say that I'll do what I can to make us feared on the field.

[Naosu]

Goku improved slightly over the offseason but is getting close to his peak without doing what the league would likely count as "cheating" by scoring 150 points himself on defense every game. While sticking within league constraints Goku improved his hands and endurance. The coach says this lets him block any passes or catch the ball while sticking to his mark, but in Goku's case he can't leave his feet or he may accidentally cheat by instinct. It's his goal to score a touchdown at some point during his career and this will help with that. Improving his endurance will allow him to play the game to his full potential longer without having to pretend to be tired. This is one of the toughest aspects of the game for Goku, as he has to look around and notice when his teammates get tired. The coaching staff tells Goku which teammates he should watch and then pretend to be exhausted at the same time. Although he's reaching his peak the league seems to be introducing new legislation in the coming season and Goku continued to train even when plateaued. Rumour has it once the new legislation passes, he'll become one of the top DEs in the league as he'll be closer to what he can really do. Sadly the league will never get to see what Goku (and Vegeta) can really do.

[Goat_Whisperer]

As a player, I have taken steps forward. I managed to reach 500 TPE, which also means that my attributes as a kicker are starting to look nice. I was able to reach 100 in kick power not so long ago. That will naturally translate into being able to kick the ball hard. Especially, when the weather is challenging. For example, when there are wind and rain, those conditions are less likely to have an effect now as I have extremely strong legs that can deliver the ball wherever.

With power comes great responsibility, the coaches in Yellowknife told me that I need to keep the tactical side in mind when thinking about using my power, for that reason I have also taken lessons in intelligence. We have mainly watched videos with the coaches to help me understand what I should do and what I should not do. Nothing new, but with 100 in kick power you can imagine the importance of making the right decision. If I get it wrong, someone could get hurt, or even worse - Yellowknife could lose the game.

Tough to say whether I'm able to have a better year than last year, but I'm feeling positive. I signed a new deal during the off-season and as mentioned I have taken steps forward as a player. Everything points towards having a career year, which is exciting!

[Legally_Blind_Gamer]

PBE Affiliate Point Task - PT 22-2.