next year
IT'S OUR TIME! OUR TIME TO WIN THE ULTIMUS, AND MY TIME TO PUMP OUT THIS FUCKIN ULTIMUS WEEK LIKE IT'S A 12 POUND BABY. (THAT'S A LOT RIGHT?) WELL LET ME TELL YOU WHY IT'S THE AUSTIN COPPERHEADS YEAR ANDWHY WE ARE GOING TO WIN THE ULTIMUS WITHOUT A DOUBT. FIRST OF ALL, OUR OFFENSE IS FUCKING STACKED TO THE BRIM: THE COMBINATION OF mAKO mENDONCA AND aSHLEY oWENS IS A KILLER DUAL THREAT. nO DEFENSE CAN STOP THEIR COMBINED VERSATILITY - IT'S UNBEATABLE. tHIS IS EVIDENCED BY oWEN'S GOING 3RD IN THE LEAGUE FOR CATCHES, mENDONCA BEING A BEAST ON THE GROUND WHILE ALSO MAKING A BIG IMPACT IN THE AIR. THEY ARE UNBEATABLE, UNSTOPPABLE, UNDEFENDABLE. aND THEN OF COURSE THERE'S MY MAN eASTON cOLE, WHO IS THE nsfl'S BEST UP AND COMNIG QUARTERBACK AND ALL AROUND STUD. THEN OF COURSE, anoa'i, THE ABSOLUTE bomb of a wide reicevr. He's gonna destroy every cornerback in his path. We're a young solid group and onlygetting better. I look forwar dto our defense also destroying everybody because we are going to be the next big juggernaut in the National SImulatin= Football League and I nkow for a fact you all aren ot prepared. So best of luck. Copperheads are coming and you will need antivenom to preven a painful death.
Ribalry
You know who struggled? The butchers. The Chicago Butchers struggled because they are the worst of the expansion teams. They sold out to make the playoffs, getting old guys in expansion draft and not thinking forward in their draft strategy and this is how it has paid off. With their losing 6-40 in the playoffs against the Baltimore Hawks (the first round of the baltimore hawks mind you). That game saw Rose Jenkins post a sub 55 passer rating, throwing 0 touchdwons and 1 interception, all while their star runningback Sam Torsenson had the highest yards per carry on the team with just 3.8. The defense played well enough, getting 2 interceptions and 2 sacks, but abysmal offensive peformance (as I 've come ot expect from my most hated rivals the Chicago Butchers) was too much. Now why do I want the Butchers to suck and lose do you ask? Well you see good sir or madam, the Butchers were the other expansion team. But their short-sighted tactics meant while they did have immediate success, it is fleeting, but the immediate success gave them recognition while Austin's more long term strategy made us go 0-14 and be the laughing stock of the league when in fact, we are in a much better place moving forwards than them.That's why I hate them.
KICKERS ARE PEOPLE TOO OMG
I'm so excited this prompt was added. AFTER I STOPPED BEING A KICKER OF 11 SEASONS WTF BRUH. ALMOST 2 YEARS I SPENT AS A KICKER AND NOW IT'S ADDED? That said not like I made the playoffs anyways. So the kicker I'd like to discusstoday is ForThe Brand. His playoff performance was.... less than stellar. However that's why I'm talking about him. Because he is a young kicker with such an amazingly bright future. Just because the Wraiths played badly doesn't mean they can shift all the blame onto his missed kick. I grant you, it was really fucking bad in terms of misses. Really very incredibly bad beause it was a miss from the Baltimore 6 yard line. And I grant you, he missed 2 of his 7 extra point attempts in the routing of the Yeti. granted this was an auto-win game but um. Wow 5 of 7 on extra points is really bad. BUT! He is young and full of promise. I'll have you know that in the Yellowknife loss to the Hawks, he missed a kick but he also made one kick and made all 3 of his extra point attempts. The wraiths will regeret trading an active kicker like him to San Jose for an aging Neo Donaldson.
All About the QBs
THis is true you know. It's always allllll about those quarterbacks. You can have a star linebacker, a star wide receiver, a star cornerback, a star tight end, a start runningback, a star offensive guard even, but nobody cares all that much compared to the quarterback, unless the quarterback is just THAT BAD. Wanna know a quarterback who was just that bad these playoffs? That would be ARMSTRONG. Did he got for 6 touchdowns and 0 interceptions over the course of 3 games on his way to an Ultimus victory with the Otters? Yes. Yes he did. HOWEVER. He is a fraud! His own team didn't trust him to throw more than 31 passes in a game, and the other two gmes had even less. His stats were inflated by excellent Run after Catch yardage by his receivers. .... Nah he was actually very good, bravo to him. He's an example of a good quarterback (this postseason anyways) and while I didn't want to highlight his performance, I admit his deserves such highlighting at this time. He consistently found receivers downfield, very importantly didn't turn the ball over, and he even posted ~280 yards in 2 of his three games, and in that last game at least surpassed 200. Again, his usage by the coaches aided his stats a lot, but, a good quarterback performance nonetheless.
IT'S OUR TIME! OUR TIME TO WIN THE ULTIMUS, AND MY TIME TO PUMP OUT THIS FUCKIN ULTIMUS WEEK LIKE IT'S A 12 POUND BABY. (THAT'S A LOT RIGHT?) WELL LET ME TELL YOU WHY IT'S THE AUSTIN COPPERHEADS YEAR ANDWHY WE ARE GOING TO WIN THE ULTIMUS WITHOUT A DOUBT. FIRST OF ALL, OUR OFFENSE IS FUCKING STACKED TO THE BRIM: THE COMBINATION OF mAKO mENDONCA AND aSHLEY oWENS IS A KILLER DUAL THREAT. nO DEFENSE CAN STOP THEIR COMBINED VERSATILITY - IT'S UNBEATABLE. tHIS IS EVIDENCED BY oWEN'S GOING 3RD IN THE LEAGUE FOR CATCHES, mENDONCA BEING A BEAST ON THE GROUND WHILE ALSO MAKING A BIG IMPACT IN THE AIR. THEY ARE UNBEATABLE, UNSTOPPABLE, UNDEFENDABLE. aND THEN OF COURSE THERE'S MY MAN eASTON cOLE, WHO IS THE nsfl'S BEST UP AND COMNIG QUARTERBACK AND ALL AROUND STUD. THEN OF COURSE, anoa'i, THE ABSOLUTE bomb of a wide reicevr. He's gonna destroy every cornerback in his path. We're a young solid group and onlygetting better. I look forwar dto our defense also destroying everybody because we are going to be the next big juggernaut in the National SImulatin= Football League and I nkow for a fact you all aren ot prepared. So best of luck. Copperheads are coming and you will need antivenom to preven a painful death.
Ribalry
You know who struggled? The butchers. The Chicago Butchers struggled because they are the worst of the expansion teams. They sold out to make the playoffs, getting old guys in expansion draft and not thinking forward in their draft strategy and this is how it has paid off. With their losing 6-40 in the playoffs against the Baltimore Hawks (the first round of the baltimore hawks mind you). That game saw Rose Jenkins post a sub 55 passer rating, throwing 0 touchdwons and 1 interception, all while their star runningback Sam Torsenson had the highest yards per carry on the team with just 3.8. The defense played well enough, getting 2 interceptions and 2 sacks, but abysmal offensive peformance (as I 've come ot expect from my most hated rivals the Chicago Butchers) was too much. Now why do I want the Butchers to suck and lose do you ask? Well you see good sir or madam, the Butchers were the other expansion team. But their short-sighted tactics meant while they did have immediate success, it is fleeting, but the immediate success gave them recognition while Austin's more long term strategy made us go 0-14 and be the laughing stock of the league when in fact, we are in a much better place moving forwards than them.That's why I hate them.
KICKERS ARE PEOPLE TOO OMG
I'm so excited this prompt was added. AFTER I STOPPED BEING A KICKER OF 11 SEASONS WTF BRUH. ALMOST 2 YEARS I SPENT AS A KICKER AND NOW IT'S ADDED? That said not like I made the playoffs anyways. So the kicker I'd like to discusstoday is ForThe Brand. His playoff performance was.... less than stellar. However that's why I'm talking about him. Because he is a young kicker with such an amazingly bright future. Just because the Wraiths played badly doesn't mean they can shift all the blame onto his missed kick. I grant you, it was really fucking bad in terms of misses. Really very incredibly bad beause it was a miss from the Baltimore 6 yard line. And I grant you, he missed 2 of his 7 extra point attempts in the routing of the Yeti. granted this was an auto-win game but um. Wow 5 of 7 on extra points is really bad. BUT! He is young and full of promise. I'll have you know that in the Yellowknife loss to the Hawks, he missed a kick but he also made one kick and made all 3 of his extra point attempts. The wraiths will regeret trading an active kicker like him to San Jose for an aging Neo Donaldson.
All About the QBs
THis is true you know. It's always allllll about those quarterbacks. You can have a star linebacker, a star wide receiver, a star cornerback, a star tight end, a start runningback, a star offensive guard even, but nobody cares all that much compared to the quarterback, unless the quarterback is just THAT BAD. Wanna know a quarterback who was just that bad these playoffs? That would be ARMSTRONG. Did he got for 6 touchdowns and 0 interceptions over the course of 3 games on his way to an Ultimus victory with the Otters? Yes. Yes he did. HOWEVER. He is a fraud! His own team didn't trust him to throw more than 31 passes in a game, and the other two gmes had even less. His stats were inflated by excellent Run after Catch yardage by his receivers. .... Nah he was actually very good, bravo to him. He's an example of a good quarterback (this postseason anyways) and while I didn't want to highlight his performance, I admit his deserves such highlighting at this time. He consistently found receivers downfield, very importantly didn't turn the ball over, and he even posted ~280 yards in 2 of his three games, and in that last game at least surpassed 200. Again, his usage by the coaches aided his stats a lot, but, a good quarterback performance nonetheless.
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![[Image: HtYhYYf.png]](https://i.imgur.com/HtYhYYf.png)
